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Thursday, April 3, 2025

Featured - The Best Sex Education Articles for Adults

Sexpert.com has the Best Sex Education Articles for Adults from an expert line up of certified sex experts.

Top sex education for adults featured posts and sexuality articles from our sex experts, sex coaches on everything from female orgasms, sexual pleasure, alternative lifestyle topics, couples sex advice and dating advice, masturbation and sexual empowerment, sexual health and wellness including men’s sexual problems like premature ejaculation and how to last longer in the bedroom.

Our Sex Ed featured articles include all the tips and techniques you need to know to make you a better lover such as the ultimate guide to anal sex, BDSM and kinky sex, oral sex, how to have the best orgasms, sexual relationship topics on how to spice up your love life, as well as female sexual anatomy and the erogenous zones including the clitoris, the cervix and cervical orgasm, all about the g spot, female ejaculation and g spot orgasms, the vagina and the vulva, penis facts and more.

Sexpert.com is an all-inclusive sex education site for adults and has many empowering articles on gender and sexuality, as well as articles for gays, lesbians, bisexuals, transgender, sissies, and alternative lifestyles including cuckold and hotwife relationships, threesomes, polyamory and swinging. See our sacred sexuality topics including Tantra sex, yoni yoga, sexy goddess rituals, energy orgasms and more.

Explore sexpert articles from our top sex educators.

Hooray For The Erotic Anthology

In the book publishing game, authors are usually advised a few months prior to their book being published, so as to gear up the old P.R. machine. I was just told about an erotic anthology I’ve placed a story in, coming out in November, from the good folks at SinCyr Publishing. (Here are some pre-sale links Here and Here, if you are so interested; sorry for the cheap plug) I have been published by this company before and I can say that both their eBooks and print versions are of the best quality… .and their authors top-notch.

 

Even a little old author named Ralph Greco, Jr. is pretty good. I look forward to reading his short story and all the others, written by authors Kristan X, Elizabeth Coldwell, Sprocket J. Rydyr, Jordan Monroe, Eve Ray, Louise Kane, Elliot Sawyer, Dilo Keith, Colton Aalto, Zak Jane Keir, Allison Armstrong, gathered together for the new book called Scandalous.

I’ll pepper social media and my other contacts until the November 30th release date (and after) as best I can. Luckily with an anthology, you have all the other authors who are onboard pushing in their own way so that one usually sees a pretty wide-ranging coverage of the title.

 

This is just one of the reasons we erotica writers love anthologies.

 

Another reason is that you get to rub shoulders (mostly only digitally though) with authors you might never get to meet. Sometimes this leads to introductions being made, friendships forming, and maybe even some work coming your way from your new author buddy when they come across a lead they want to share.

 

Authors are also good for placing that weird little story you might not have yet found a home for. I have often found a specific theme of antho submission call sparks my memory with a “Hey; I have that story about spiders and leather that would be just perfect for this…Spider and Leather-themes antho.”

 

Another good thing about anthologies is they can introduce you to a publisher who might be putting out more books in the future. I felt warm and fuzzy sending a new story to SinCyr because they had treated me so well before, the introduction had already been made, they were aware of my quality of work. Not that it was a slam dunk that they’d use another story of mine for Scandalous or any new book they were publishing. But I did have somewhat of a track record with them, all because I had submitted and been picked for one of their past anthologies. And sometimes, a publisher is more open to accepting a one-off story from a writer or a bunch of them submitted over a few years before they will consider a stand-alone single-author collection or a novel…if even the publisher is looking for these.

 

Really, I am all for anthologies. Readers like to gobble them up because they can get a bunch of stories from a wide range of authors and don’t have to commit to just one naughty scribe. And often, those readers will seek out one or two writers they especially liked from the antho, and those authors could make another sale with other books they have written or their work appears in.

 

It’s a win-win across the board here! So, let’s say hooray with erotica anthologies, even when they are Scandalous.

Sexpert Panel on Disabilities and Intimacy

A Sexpert Panel hosted by Loveology University® & Sponsored by Hot Octopuss

Watch our panel discussion below!

Our Panelists Are:
Dr. Ava Cadell, Tamara Bell, Carlana Stone, Dr. Mitchell Tepper, Dr. Kevin Mintz, Asta Philpot, Kelly Gordon

Meet our Moderator and Panelists

MODERATOR
Dr. Ava Cadell, Clinical Sexologist, Author & Founder of LoveUniv.com

*All attendees will receive a Loveology University’s Disabilities & Intimacy Course*

Dr. Ava Cadell is a Clinical Sexologist, author of 11 books and AASECT Certified Sex Counselor with Doctorates in Human Behavior and Human Sexuality. As the Founder of Loveology University® Higher Learning and Loving in 2007, Dr. Ava has taken on the role of mentor to share her vast knowledge on love, romance, relationships, intimacy and human sexuality with motivated students who train to become Certified Love Coaches, Master Sexperts and Relationship Coaches. Dr. Ava is exceptionally proud of her multi-media course on Intimacy & Disabilities as she filmed a documentary with Carlana Stone and another with Asta Philpot to share their erotic empowerment for people with disabilities, as part of the LU curriculum. LoveUniv.com is accredited by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT) as well as the American College of Sexologists International (ACS). As a global speaker, Dr. Ava has traveled across the U.S., Europe, India, Asia, Australia, and Africa, promoting the benefits of healthy love and sex through sexual empowerment. For more information, go to https://www.avacadell.com/

Tamara Bell, ACS Certified Sex Educator & Certified  Loveologist & Love Coach

Tamara is an ACS Certified Sexologist &  Certified Loveologist and Love Coach.  She is a 2008 graduate of Loveology University®. She is the Ambassador of Students and mentor to Loveology students to help them prepare for their final exam. After student graduation, she helps them to define their coaching specialties, set up their personal branding and incorporate Love Coaching within their business.  She also co-facilitates a zoom podcast with Viloshni Moodley from South Africa, discussing issues regarding Love, Sex and Relationships from around the world.

She received her certification as a Death Doula from IAP college in April 2021.  As a widow herself, her goal is to assist wives who have lost their husbands.  She is also here to help families through this difficult time.  Tamara holds a B.S. in Business Management and is currently pursuing a degree in Family Studies. She was recently inducted into the Phi Theta Kappa Honor Society.

She is the founder of the Home Pleasure Party Plan Association. She assists party plan business owners in developing and expanding their business.  Tamara excels in management, networking, and supplies consulting to those looking to start or expand a Pleasure Party industry career. She is a NAASAS council member and Free Speech Coalition member. For more information, go to https://ladycoaching.com

Carlana Stone, Author

Carlana Stone is a published author, international speaker, and the founder of a non-profit organization. She’s also an Emmy-nominated, award-winning television producer with over two decades experience collaborating with some of the top creative entertainment & technology pipelines in the world. Stone began her career as the first wheelchair-wielding tv news reporter for ABC in Miami. She pushed her way into Hollywood producing shows such as A&E’s Intervention Judge Judy, and the Biggest Loser.​ Her style is characterized by her wholehearted grit and straightforward approach, infused with a signature dose of ‘Sugah’ and Louisiana spice.

​​​Breaking stereotypes and challenging stigmas are a way of life for Stone, who has achieved a multitude of accomplishments that defy her physical limitations. ​ She also made cross-country road trips on her custom-built Harley​ and became a certified scuba diver in Grand Cayman and she became one of the worlds first paraplegics to fly an airplane solo, plus she has jumped out one! https://www.carlanastone.info/

Dr. Mitchell Tepper, Author, PhD Human Sexuality

Dr. Mitchell Tepper, author of Regain that Feeling: Secrets to Sexual Self-Discovery, brings a lifetime of first-hand experience with chronic conditions and disability to his work as a Sexuality Researcher, Educator, Coach and self-proclaimed Prophet of Pleasure. He has a PhD in Human Sexuality Education from the University of Pennsylvania and a Master’s in Public Health from Yale. Dr. Tepper worked on ground-breaking research on orgasm in women with spinal cord injuries with world-renowned orgasm researchers Drs. Beverly Whipple and Barry Komisaruk. Over the last 14 years, Dr. Tepper has turned his attention to helping wounded veterans and their partners navigate intimate relationships. His forthcoming documentary, Love After War: Saving Love, Saving Lives, tells the stories of intimate partners who have won the battle for love. Dr. Tepper is also Co-Chair of this year’s Love Abilities Virtual Sexuality and Disability Festival to be held October 20 to 22, 2021. For more information, go to Drmitchelltepper.com

Dr. Tepper and Lorraine Stanley are Co-chairs for the 2nd Annual Love Abilities Virtual Sexuality and Disability Festival, October 20-22 & you can sign up for notices at http://loveabilities.org

Dr. Kevin Mintz, Human Sexuality

Dr. Kevin Minttz has an AB from Harvard College and an MS in Political Theory from the London School of Economics and Political Science. He also earned a Doctor of Human Sexuality from The Institute for the Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco. He grew up in Miami and resides on campus in Munger Graduate Housing. Kevin spends his free time volunteering as a sex educator with San Francisco Sex Information, a non-profit organization in the city.

“I am Ph.D candidate in Political Science with Cerebral Palsy. I use a wheelchair and have always been known to study topics that very few others would study, but my dissertation project here at Stanford is by far the most unique project I have ever undertaken. Instead of being viewed as less capable because of my disabilities and unique research interests, I am viewed as a scholar with new ideas that are just as worthy of intellectual scrutiny as those of other graduate students.” Dr. Kevin Mintz. For more information, go to https://kevintoddmintz.com/

Asta Philpot

Asta Philpot is a world-famous disability rights campaigner, actor, singer, speaker, presenter and writer pioneering and starring in documentaries and movies across the world, Asta continues to change perceptions surrounding disability. He is also a Certified Love Coach through Loveology University.

Asta’s inspiring story led to two movies, Hasta la Vista, a critically acclaimed Belgian comedy road trip that follows three guys with disabilities on their quest to lose their virginity. Hasta la Vista has won 30 awards to date across the world. Following on from the success of Hasta la Vista, Asta’s story got made into a USA remake. Starring an all-star cast and is already winning awards at film festivals across the world.  Both movies are based on Asta’s incredible true story, and you can watch it as it’s released on Demand this year. For more information, go to https://www.astaphilpot.com/

Kelly Gordon

Kelly Perks-Bevington is a 32-year-old entrepreneur and consultant based in the West Midlands, UK! She has Spinal Muscular Atrophy Type 3 which is a genetic disability meaning for her, that she uses an electric wheelchair to get around. Kelly’s condition is progressive and has meant that she has faced losing her ability throughout her life especially when her body faced big changes and challenges such as pregnancy.

Kelly has two young sons, which is quite trying for any parent but absolutely loves parenting with her disability with help from her supportive partner Josh and her awesome team of PA’s! From a young age Kelly was outspoken and never let anyone dictate what her disability meant or allowed her to do this has seen her go through mainstream schools, get into a lot of trouble at college and ultimately push herself through many exciting and predominately male dominated industries. Kelly now works as a consultant which allows her to dedicate her time to projects that truly excite her and allows her also to manage her time to ensure she has sufficient time with her young sons. Kellys current projects span from recruitment to working for forward thinking sex toy brand Hot Octopuss.

Kelly also works as a presenter and is the current host of Hot Octopuss’s brand podcast Pleasure Rebels, as well as this Kelly has also worked on projects for the BBC, Channel 4 and Virgin Media. Kelly also regularly appears in mainstream media throughout the UK discussing issues that disabled people face and advocating for other disabled people. Kelly has also co-founded the business “With Not For” with Emma Gardner. Kelly and Emma are working together on this project to not only get disabled people into work but to push disabled people into high paid and high-power roles, ultimately getting them to boardroom level by embracing talent, confidence and reeducating big employers about the benefits of adding people with disabilities to their teams! For more information, go to www.hotoctopuss.com.

Misgendered: Not Complimented

This butterfly is gender fluid and called gynandromorphs which are the organisms showing both female and male characteristics. The term is derived from the Greek words (gyne = woman; aner = man and morphe = form).

Gender Fluidity

It has taken me time to discover my gender fluid identity. Gender fluid is defined as denoting or relating to a person who does not identify themselves as having a fixed gender. There is a mix or fluctuation of genders. At times someone who identifies as gender fluid may feel more one gender than another.

I definitely feel and express my fluidity. Being a drag queen I am able to explore and cross the lines of gender. During my self exploration I have found that she/her pronouns are more comfortable, although I do use he/him pronouns when I am out of drag.

Figures merge female to male

Misgendering Someone is NOT Okay

I write this now because I just want to make it known what is not complementary and that it is not okay to misgender someone.

Compliments or remarks such as:

  • You have a nice ass for a guy.
  • Crossdressing men like you mess me up in a good way.
  • Using masculine identifiers such as bro, guys, or dude when I’m in drag.
  • You look good for a guy.
  • I’m not gay but you look so hot dressed up.
  • When are you transitioning?
  • You’re young, things change.
  • I’m not gay, but tgirls with cocks turn me on.
  • Try hiding your Adam’s apple.
  • Stop tricking people that you’re a woman.
  • I don’t care what you are. You have a dick. You’re a man.
  • You only dress to attract men.

I’m sure there is more I can add to the list but those are common compliments/ignorant remarks from people.

I am Often Misgendered

I am often misgendered for being a man that plays dress up or as a trans woman.

I do not care for any masculine references when I am in drag. To me, it is insulting. It often has the connotation that I am obviously not a woman, and that my femininity is not valid. Not that I am a woman, but people do not respect my feminine appearance.

I also still do not understand why everyone who is not homosexual uses the word gay negatively. I am not gay but, or ew that’s gay.

One you do not have to be homosexual to be complementary of someone who is of the same sex as you. Two it’s not a bad thing to be homosexual. It’s not gross. I dislike when people have to justify their heterosexuality by beginning a thought with, I’m not gay but…

I do understand the confusion at times when people think I am a trans woman. But one thing we should not do is assume. I have no interest in transitioning. I am not a tgirl.

I understand that I am young but my youth is not defining that I will change overnight in regards to my gender identity. Turning 24 years young today, I am certain. It is not okay to tell someone that, oh you will change or make assumptions about a future change. Just in general, do not make assumptions about anyone.

Lastly, I want to make it known that I do not do drag to trick men into thinking I am a woman nor to please men’s misogynistic beliefs that femininity and presenting feminine beauty is for men.

I do drag for me.

It makes me feel good. I am able to express myself with my drag and through drag is where I ultimately discovered my gender fluid identity. I fully know I have an Adam’s apple. I know that I expose my “man chest” and pad my hips at the same time. I do it because it makes me feel good.

Do not flatter yourselves boys. The age where feminine beauty is used for your sole pleasure and enjoyment is over.

My purpose in writing this is to make it a little clearer about my gender identity. I take this opportunity not to rant or tell people what they are doing wrong. I want this to be educational. Not enough conversation happens in regard to gender identity.

Just know, I am gender fluid. I use she/her pronouns primarily but am okay with he/him pronouns when I am out of drag. Masculine references to my drag are not complementary. Do not assume and misgender me for being male, trans nor female. I am fluid, I fluctuate.

Remember, one individual can not be representative of a whole. Just because I identify as gender fluid does not mean someone else who identifies as gender fluid is the same as me.

Powerful Penny: The Feminist Sexpert Interviews Penny Barber

Image from Penny Barber

Her handle may be Pampered Penny. Yet after talking with Entrepreneur Penny Barber (AKA Penelope Barber), producer/director, performer, storyteller/filmmaker, and author, the Feminist Sexpert would like to bequeath a new title on this formidable Elizabeth Taylor lookalike: Powerful Penny.

Known for playing the busty, glasses-wearing Taboo MILF who likes to sling verbal humiliation and Kinky Mommy Dom in equal measure, Penny has made her own special mark on the adult industry for more than a decade. Indeed, this proud feminist has made countless clips, authored two books on age play, and shot with various independent clip producers. She has worked with AllHerLuv/Missa X, Sweet Femdom, Team Skeet, MYLF.com, PervMom, Kink.com, and Gwen Media. As a content creator, she enters film festivals and creates professional cinematic pieces. And her award shelf is overflowing, lined with honors from the Best MILF Clip Artist from the 2021 XBIZ Cam Awards (an award that came complete with a prominent feature in the current XBIZ World Mag), to noms for Most Popular Fetish Star from the Urban X Awards, Best Clip Performer of the Year from the Fleshbot Awards, Favorite Domme from the AVN Awards, and Girl-Girl Scene of the Year from the Inked Awards.

“I always strive to do good work and connect with audiences,” she said. “It brings me a sense of accomplishment to be acknowledged.”

Penny also sees her honors as validation of the empowered glamour that a ‘MILF’ can bring to the adult industry.

“These days, older women are more fetishized,” she said. “There was once this bizarre belief that a woman had to be in her 20s to be appealing. That’s not true–a woman of 40, of 50, can be just as sexy.”

And as they supply rich erotic fantasies to audiences everywhere, Penny insists that she and other performers be treated with respect on set; gladly offering assistance to performers who feel disrespected on set.

“I always believe that, if you don’t like something, say something,” she said. “I’ve always been the girl on set that other girls could come and talk to if they had a problem.”

The same goes for fans.

“I love connecting with my fans,” she said. “And while I understand that people get explicit in requesting what they want to see when they order custom photos and videos from me, they need to know how to act when talking to me.”

The Feminist Sexpert, who herself has been on the receiving end of disrespectful communications as a writer and marketer in adult, cannot second this sentiment more. I care about the way that the public treats my sisterfriends and me; and to me, every woman who creates, promotes, writes and/or appears in content is a sisterfriend.

As for sisterfriend Penny, she says that there’s not a moment to spare in her life, as she writes, produces, directs and performs her way to fame.

“There’s so much I want to do,” she says.

Stay in the know about everything in her world by following her Twitter at @pamperedpenny and Instagram @PennyBarberMILF. Support her art by subscribing to her official site tabooview.com, buying her clips at Clips4Sale clips4sale.com/studio/18369/miss-penny-barber and clips4sale.com/studio/11315/pampered-penny and ManyVids manyvids.com/Profile/147843/Penny-Barber/Store/Videos, as well as subscribing to her OnlyFans at onlyfans.com/pamperedpenny. “Like” her Pornhub videos pornhub.com/pornstar/penny-barber. Check out her mainstream and Indie projects at pennybarberfilms.com.

10 of the Hottest Erogenous Zones Explained

Photo by Саша Соколова from Pexels

Understanding erogenous zones and how to stimulate them effectively is extremely important for the overall quality of your sex life. Below I’ll discuss what erogenous zones are, complete with some of the main examples.

Table of Contents

What is an erogenous zone?

Erogenous zones are areas of the body that are highly sensitive to touch. This allows these areas to be stimulated easily and that stimulation can subsequently lead to intense feelings of sexual pleasure and/or arousal. For this reason, erogenous zones are especially important when engaging in foreplay.

Crucially, the sensitivity of erogenous zones can differ from one person to another, meaning the resulting level of stimulation and sexual excitement can vary significantly. This is why it is important to communicate with your sexual partners and learn about their individual response to different erogenous zones being stimulated.

How are different erogenous zones stimulated?

Different erogenous zones are stimulated in different ways and research in this area can be quite complicated. For this reason, it is best to break the answer down by looking at 10 of the most commonly enjoyed erogenous zones.

Ears

The ears are sometimes neglected when it comes to specifically targeting erogenous zones, but the skin here is extremely sensitive and stimulation can result in intense pleasure for many people. Additionally, sensory receptors inside the ear can add to the entire experience, giving you a lot of freedom in terms of how stimulation is achieved.

These options range from whispering or blowing gently into the ears, stimulating the internal sensory receptors, through to touching the outer skin gently with your fingers, or kissing, biting or licking the earlobes. 

Navel

The navel – and the lower abdomen in general – is another area of heightened sensitivity and many people respond positively to simple touch using your fingers, or stimulation through kissing or licking. This is true for both men and women, although some research suggests that sensations can be more intense for women.

One of the reasons the navel is such a powerful erogenous zone is its location, close to the genitals. Not only does this make it a convenient place to focus efforts during foreplay, it can also help to build anticipation.

Feet and Toes

The feet and toes are one of the more interesting erogenous zones, because some people enjoy the sensation of having their feet massaged, or their toes sucked, while others actually find the experience to be quite unpleasant, or too intense. It can be especially problematic if you or your partner is ticklish in this region.

Essentially, feet are an erogenous zone due to the high concentration of nerve endings found in the soles and in the toes. However, the density of nerve receptors is also why many people have ticklish feet.

G-Spot

The G-spot is an erogenous zone that is located within the vagina. More specifically, it is located along the front wall, typically around 2 to 3 inches in. In terms of stimulation, it is most easily reached using fingers, or using a sex toy that has been specifically designed with G-spot stimulation in mind.

Medical research on the G-spot is contradictory, to the extent that there is not even a scientific consensus that the G-spot exists. Some women do not experience G-spot stimulation, but others do and when stimulation occurs it is usually described as being intense. Again, this is believed to be the result of a high concentration of nerve endings!

Anus

The anus is another example of an erogenous zone that divides opinion. Some people can derive pleasure from anal stimulation, while others dislike it intensely. It is also versatile, because it can be stimulated on the rim, on the skin around it, or through penetration. This ensures you have plenty of different options to explore.

In men, of course, the anus also provides access to the prostate, which is another important erogenous zone. This can be stimulated using a finger, a sex toy, or via anal sex and the sensation is often compared to the female G-spot.

Clitoris

The clitoris is the single most important erogenous zone in the female anatomy, and one of the primary areas linked to sexual pleasure. In fact, because the clitoris does not have a reproductive function, it is believed by many scientists to exist solely for sexual pleasure. It also contains an incredible 8,000 nerve endings.

In terms of how the clitoris can be stimulated, oral sex and the use of fingers are common, while it is also common for vibrators and other similar sex toys to be used for this purpose.

Nipples

Nipples are one of the most widely loved erogenous zones and while stimulation of the nipples is most commonly associated with female sexuality, the nipples on the male anatomy are also highly sensitive to touch.

Stimulation of the nipples can be achieved using fingers, licking, sucking, or through contact with another object. Nipples also respond to temperature changes, so an ice cube could be used to heighten sensation. Some women even report being able to achieve a ‘nipple orgasm’, which is an orgasm achieved through nipple stimulation alone.

Glans

The glans penis, colloquially referred to as the ‘head’, can boast 4,000 nerve endings, making it the single most sensitive part of the penis, as well as the area that is most commonly associated with sexual pleasure.

This area is sometimes described as being the male equivalent of the clitoris and while this is something of an over-simplification, it does help to explain why it is such an important erogenous zone. Stimulation of the glans can be achieved via oral sex, use of hands, or through sexual intercourse. 

Testicles

The testicles and surrounding area, including the scrotum, are a major erogenous zone on the male anatomy, owing to the presence of highly sensitive nerve endings in the region. It is also an area that can be easily stimulated while also performing other sex acts, in order to heighten pleasure or increase arousal.

For instance, the testicles and scrotal sack can be massaged, kissed, licked or sucked, in order to create a pleasant sensation. Massaging can be easily combined with oral sex, while kissing, licking or sucking can be combined with manual stimulation of the penis via hand, helping to increase feelings of sexual pleasure.

Cervix

Finally, the cervix is located deep inside the vaginal canal and is not always recognized as an erogenous zone, but it can certainly be one. In fact, it is sometimes referred to as the C-spot and some women describe an ability to achieve cervical orgasms, which are extremely intense, potentially spreading throughout the entire body!

There are some important things to note, however. Not all women experience sexual pleasure from cervical stimulation and any attempt to stimulate this area depends on a sufficient level of arousal. If the circumstances are right, stimulation can be achieved through deep penetration, either with a penis or with a sex toy such as a realistic dildo

Self-Publishing & Erotica: The Cold Hard Facts-Part 3

Photo by Cristian Jako from Pexels

Ok, so here it is. Sorry, it took me three columns to get here, but the stuff I laid out in part 1 and part 2, I thought necessary. If you are still with me and want to furrow forward into self-publishing, here are some specific facts I can offer.

1.)  There are lots of book producers out there; choose wisely.

For those of us looking to get a book out there, especially first-timers, there are plenty of companies—what I call ‘book producers’ (you can call them a ‘vanity press’)—who will help you through various stages of preparing your book or can push you through the entire process. Some of these companies are honorable; others not so much. 

There are always lots of folks out there looking to take advantage of you. I’m sorry, but it’s true. If you go this route, do your research, read reviews, talk to other self-published authors if you can, and learn which of these companies are worth giving your money to.

Remember, you can also reach out to a copywriter, layout person, cover artist yourself.

2.)  Amazon will help…to a certain degree.

In some cases, Amazon has become the only game in town, something I warned about way back in one of my earlier columns, and they can be incredibly sketchy for erotica writers. Amazon can/will and forever determine what they want on their portal, and when it comes to erotica, they tend to move the goalposts at whim, determining just what subjects, even what words, they will allow. Subjects like age-play, certainly anything to do with people pretending to be family members (this includes characters calling each other “mommy” or “naughty baby boy” in a story), get in trouble all the time with Amazon. Sex mixed with horror and anything hinting at ‘water sports’ also tends to throw up the old Amazon-y red flags.

The good stuff about Amazon (beyond their reach and that everyone who is anyone will ask you first and foremost “So, is your book up on Amazon?”) is that you can order an ‘Author’s Copy’ (see here) from Amazon for only a minimal amount of money. Doing this, you can get a print copy of your book in your hot little hands, gaze at every inch of it and determine if the book is to your liking. If not, you can easily go back into Amazon and change whatever you like, even order another copy later (yes, just one) and have another look-see. This cuts down on the expense (and believe me, way back, I incurred this expense, so I know it can be expensive) of ordering a box of your book (even now, book printers have a minimum amount that they need to print to complete an order) and realizing the print version didn’t come out the way you wanted it to! Then having to go back and change templates and order a bunch all over again, hoping for the best.

3.)  Diversify.

You can list your book across multiple retailers. If you want to grab an ISBN #, you can do so via the Library of Congress and pretty much reach out and sell at any retailer that will have you. You are under no contract when you self-publish.

4.)  Erotica is indeed different so treat it differently by self-publishing

As I have been writing here, erotica is different. Considered by many, even other professional writers, as the red-haired stepchild of fiction genres, it’s hard to get mainstream attention for a naughty book without that attention being pejorative. So doing this yourself, at least for your first few forays at publishing, and maybe ever onward, is a good way forward. But don’t worry, there are plenty of places to contact and network. There’s the SEX POSITIVE BOOKS BLOG on Twitter@BooksSex, the UK-based eroticaforall.co.uk, GoodReads.com, and the ERWA, to name just a few places that will get you up and running.

5.) The Profit Is Yours.

When you are under no contract, when you set up your little self-publishing concern on Amazon or wherever, print a box of books for that lecture you are giving, even sell your tomes out of the back of your car, the profit from sales are 100% yours. By selling eBooks, you’ll keep your overhead even lower as you do not have to incur the expense of printing books.

You might indeed find or get contacted by a publisher you do want to publish through. God knows, there are many advantages to doing so. But keep an open mind about self-publishing. Do your research every step of the way and find the avenue that works best for your book, knowing that, these days, you can do a lot of the work you pay others for (either directly or from a split of your royalties) yourself and enjoy a better percentage of the profits.

Tantric Gspot Pleasure & Female Ejaculation

The Goddess Spot

“The illusive G-spot is definitely not a myth but a treasure, which when explored can result in a deeper, longer orgasm.”–Dr. Ava Cadell

The G-spot has many fun phrases associated with it; great-spot, glory-spot, go-ahead spot-but I like to call it the Goddess spot. It is located inside the woman’s vagina about a third of the way, in between the vaginal/Yoni opening and the cervix. The G-spot has a ridged texture to it and responds to gentle stroking. In many women, once properly stimulated, it can provide a very powerful orgasm. It also may produce an ejaculation (an expulsion of milky looking fluid) which they refer to as Amrita or ‘divine nectar’ in Tantric terms.

The individual differences and responses to G-spot stimulation are so varied that women should not feel pressured into finding their G-spot. However, if you decide to embark on this quest, consider it a treasure hunt. You may or may not find the treasure you expected, but the hunt can be a great source of adventure and personal knowledge. Many women have reported that they have difficulty locating and stimulating the G-spot by themselves, but they have no difficulty identifying the erotic sensation when a partner stimulates the spot.

Exploring the G-Spot

Gynecologist Ernest Grafenberg, who published research results about sexual pleasure being derived from the urethra, first identified the G-spot area. Dr. Beverly Whipple did further research on G-spot orgasms. The results are available in her book The G-spot and Other Recent Discoveries About Human Sexuality by Dell Publishers. She indicates the G-spot area swells when stimulated and may lead to orgasm. Some women claim that the G-spot can be a longer, deeper, more powerful orgasm than a Pearl/clitoral orgasm.

For most women, stimulation of the 8000 nerve fibers of the Pearl/clitoris, especially by a talented tongue, results in orgasm. Then there are those who swear the G-spot orgasm is the ultimate orgasm.

The illusive G-spot is definitely not a myth but a treasure, which when explored can result in a deeper, longer orgasm. Some women are even capable of ejaculating from it.

Stimulating your Lover’s G-Spot

1. Have your lover empty her bladder before you start in order to lessen the possible feeling of needing to urinate.

2. Both of you should get into comfortable position; preferably with the woman on her
back with her pelvis raised by a pillow.

3. Put your thumb on her pubic mound or Pearl/clitoris and insert the middle or forefinger
of your hand, palm up, in a “come hither” motion inside the vagina.

4. Push gently in the outer third of the Yoni’s top region, between the opening and the cervix. When you touch a small, ridged patch area, the woman may feel sensitive as if she needs to urinate.

5. If her bladder is empty, the sensitive feeling will pass and be replaced with intense, pleasurable feelings.

6. For more pressure, use any combination of the other fingers.

7. Use long, linear strokes creating an energetic circuit between your thumb and your finger.

8. Picture a clock-face on the inside of her Yoni, and stroke with your finger from 6 o’clock to 12 o’clock.

9. Alternatively, imagine your fingers are a “windshield wiper,” and stimulate the G-spot moving your fingers from side to side.

10. Now, put your thumb above the pubic bone (with your fingers inside the Yoni) to stimulate the G-spot from inside and outside simultaneously.

11. Tap the G-spot area with your finger/s towards her navel in pulsating motions.

12. Ask her to make a mental note which movements pleasure her most.

The G-spot can also be reached using a specially designed vibrator or by making love in certain sacred sexual positions.

G-Spot Sacred Sexual Union

Don’t make love in the same position, in the same place, at the same time. Be daring; spontaneous!

Your partner will love you for it!

1. In the Missionary position, the woman can rest her feet on her lover’s shoulders. This allows for maximum stimulation of the back wall of the Yoni and thus potential stimulation of the G-spot.

2. The alternative to the ‘Woman On Top’ position is for the woman to face away from her partner. This way, the whole of the Yoni is stimulated, and the woman herself can decide where she wants to receive maximum stimulation.

3. The rear entry alternative is for the man to lay his whole body along the woman’s. In this position, the entire Yoni is stimulated, but attention is concentrated on the upper part of the front wall, which means there is relatively good stimulation of the G-spot.

4. An alternative to the standing position is for you and your partner to face one another with the woman lying back. In this position, the front wall of the Yoni is stimulated, and good contact with the G-spot is made.

The Venus Butterfly

The Venus Butterfly is an ancient lovemaking technique first practiced in India 3000 years ago. It allows the male to bring his lover to a high peak of ecstasy by simultaneously stimulating two centers of pleasure at the same time.

Directions on How to Perform the Venus Butterfly

1. Pull back your lover’s clitoral hood.

2. Stimulate the Pearl/clitoris with short and long strokes using your tongue, fingers or vibrator until the woman reaches a level 8 on a pleasure scale of 0 to 10 with 10 being the point of no return; orgasm.

3. Move away from the Pearl/clitoris and stimulate the entire outside of the Yoni in circular motions with your tongue, finger or vibrator, allowing her arousal level to lower by a couple of points.

4. Return to Pearl stimulation as above using short and long strokes until the woman reaches a 9 on the pleasure scale.

5. Slip your finger/s, palm up, inside the Yoni and tap on the G-spot towards the navel.

6. Continue to stroke the Pearl/clitoris while tapping the G-spot with your finger/s or use a G-spot vibrator.

7. Combining clitoral and G-spot stimulation may result in multiple orgasms.

8. Practice the Venus Butterfly technique and exchange feedback.

Dr. Ava’s TriGasm

How do You Achieve a Trigasm? I have been teaching the combination of simultaneous G-spot and Pearl/clitoral stimulation for several years. Couples loved it. Women got some serious attention–learning how to climax internally and externally at the same time, and men felt like they were heroes. So, here’s the revolution, the ultimate technique in orgasmic potential for women: The TriGasm.

A TriGasm is the result of arousing the 3 points of pleasure, the Pearl/clitoris, G-spot and Rosebud/anus simultaneously. Many people are experienced with various forms of dual stimulation–a Lingam and a toy, a tongue and a finger, and other combinations.

Here are some tips for you as you go off on your Trigasm exploration. Begin setting the mood and prepare to stimulate all five senses. Be creative using sensual sound, visual arousal, and feeling your lovers heat. You should also have some lubricant nearby, especially for G-spot and anal play. The final tip tell your lover to take up juggling, because it’s going to take some coordination to master this technique, but it’s well worth the effort and mighty fun while learning!

Here is the ideal way to create 3 points of stimulation with a lover.

1. The woman should lie back while her lover lavishes her Pearl with oral pleasure until she
has reached a level 8 on a pleasure scale of 1 to 10. (10 equals orgasm.)

2. Change course and stimulate her vulva in small circles with the tongue or fingers for 2 minutes.

3. Return to the Pearl and orally increase her level of pleasure to a 9; almost to the point of no return.

4. At this peak, he should insert his forefinger palm up into her Yoni and find her G-spot, then tap, tap, tap it gently towards her navel.

5. Simultaneously with step four, he must stimulate her Rosebud/anus gently with a
feather, his pinky or a vibrator to bring his lover to a mind-blowing, earth shattering, energy-melting multiple orgasm.

Her Tantric Pleasure: Female Ejaculation

Female ejaculation has been documented in ancient Asia for many thousands of years. Here in the Western world scientists are finally accepting it as a reality and women of all ages are enjoying the experience of ejaculating during orgasm. I believe that every woman can ejaculate if she is stimulated correctly and if she knows how to control her PC muscles.

It’s estimated that less than 10% of women ejaculate, or at least admit to it. In Tantra, female ejaculation is called, Amrita, which means Nectar of the Gods. Some women who experience ejaculation admit that the feeling is like an intense orgasmic release; much stronger and longer than a clitoral orgasm. Female ejaculation can be attained with stimulation of the G-spot, the spongy area located inside the Yoni about two inches on the upper wall towards the navel.

Always empty your bladder first so that the ejaculation doesn’t have any urine in it. The ejaculate fluid is protein based (much like semen) but it’s thinner and of course it doesn’t have any sperm. In summary, female ejaculation is a normal natural occurrence, so why not try it? You might like it!

Female Oral Delights

A woman is more sensitive so begin with less pressure than you would like, as a man.

1. Kiss and lick the inside of her thighs to create sexual anticipation.

2. Explore the entire vulva (outside of the Yoni) with circular tongue motions.

3. Suck on her labia (Yoni lips) gently.

4. Lavish her Yoni with your tongue in long lapping motions from her Yoni opening to her Pearl/clitoris.

5. Use a pointy tongue all around the Pearl/clitoris but not directly on it.

6. Write numbers on her entire vulva area with your tongue, then the alphabet.

7. Slip one or two fingers inside her Yoni as you gently lick her Pearl.

8. Use a stiff tongue to lick her Pearl from side to side.

9. Make humming sounds with your lips so they vibrate as you kiss the Pearl/clitoris.

10. Stroke her perenium (between the Rosebud/anus and Yoni opening) while sucking gently on her Pearl/clitoris.

11. Never rub or insert anything sugary in a woman’s Yoni because it can cause infection.

12. Draw her closer by lifting her buttocks and kissing her Yoni just as you would her mouth.

13. Alternate pressure with your tongue as you lick long and short strokes from the Rosebud to the Pearl.

14. Insert a fingertip into her Rosebud/anus as you lick her Pearl.

15. Gently pull her labia majora apart (outside lips) and lick the labia minora (inside lips) with the tip of your tongue.

16. Nuzzle your face in her mound and brush your lips and nose over her Pearl.

17. Insert your tongue into her Yoni opening with quick pointy motions.

18. Flick your tongue over Pearl alternating from up and down and side to side.

19. When she is on the verge of orgasm, make your lips into an O and take her Pearl in your mouth sucking gently.

20. Insert one or two fingers and discover her G-spot while licking her Pearl.

21. Lick her entire vulva like an ice cream cone with lapping motions.

22. Use your tongue like a snake sliding and twisting it inside her slowly, then fast.

23. Suck on some ice before licking her Yoni for a cool sensation.

24. Drink some hot liquid and then suck and twirl your hot tongue over her.

25. Don’t change the rhythm of your motion when she is climaxing.

26. Don’t stop immediately after she has climaxed. Keep going until she stops you, then cup your hands over her Yoni with fingers facing the navel.

27. Ask her how and where she wants you to lick, kiss and suck her. Tell her to direct you.

28. Orally delight her Yoni while she is lying on her stomach.

29. Orally delight her Yoni while she is in the tigress position from the rear.

30. Tell her that you love honoring her Yoni orally because she tastes and smells delicious.

Remember that practice… practice… practice makes perfect!

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Excerpt from Dr. Ava’s Tantra Workbook

Easy 3 Step Process for Keeping Your Backdoor Clean

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Ever since I became bicurious back when I was 19 years old (I now consider myself Bisexual), I have been turned on to the thought of getting fucked up the ass. Whether it’s a dildo, strap on, or a real cock. Just something to fill my hole! But my biggest struggle and turn off about anal play was keeping my hole clean. I was and still am self-conscious about having a squeaky clean ass and after much experimentation with my bum, I have finally found a routine that keeps Miss Colleen’s pussy clean!

It took months of reading, trial and error but I finally got it down.

So here is how I do it:

Fiber Vitamins

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To start I take dietary vitamins. I suggest and use myself Pure For Men (PFM). If you don’t have a high fiber diet, taking dietary vitamins can really boost your fiber levels which in turn results in packing your fecal matter tighter which helps leave less loose fecal matter in your rectum. Also PFM packaged and branded the same fiber vitamin for women called Pure for Women.

I wait approximately 4 hours after consuming a meal before I even lay a finger on my hole. I let my body digest and usually this takes 4 hours. It also helps when I drink plenty of water. Drinking a lot of water helps the cleansing even more. I usually won’t start douching until I have a bowel movement.

Anal Douching

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Now this step is critical to me and has fully given me the confidence to do anal cleanly. Anal douching. I use a 5 ounce bulb and fill myself with 10 ounces. The best position I found for this is to lay your face and chest to the floor with your ass pointing to the sky. Once I’m filled to that amount I take 10 deep breaths and relax. Then I expel the water.

Sit on the toilet with your legs elevated. This position allows for a more open pathway for residue and water to leave your rectum. Use a stool or there’s even something called the Squatty Potty which is basically a stool that wraps around your toilet. I go through this process about 3 or 4 times until the water that’s pouring out of my hole is crystal clean. Once it’s clean I wait for about a half an hour to let any excess water to leave my rectum and let my sphincter relax. Then you’re ready to get fucked!

Through a lot of reading and researching on the matter, I found a common theme. Not only do you have to be prepared physically for anal, but you have to be mentally prepared. You have to be relaxed. If at any time you feel pain or discomfort you should really stop and try again another day. Believe me it took me months to find a routine and techniques to keep my hole clean.

Should I Use Enemas?

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I would also suggest staying away from enemas. Enemas can flush out mucus from your rectum. The mucus protects the delicate inner linings of your rectum. A complete flush of this mucus can cause bleeding.

That’s the 3 Step Process!

So in conclusion I offer a 3 step process: take fiber supplements, allow your body to digest for 4 hours after a meal and douche with small amounts of water!

This process works for me and I hope it works for you!!

Tantric Prostate Massage & Trigasms for Penis Owners

Men have a hot spot too. It is the prostate gland, which can be excited by massage. Prostate massage may arouse your lover to new levels of intimate pleasure because the area of the Rosebud/anus is surrounded with sensitive nerve endings.

Before doing prostate massage, you may need to have a latex glove or finger cots available, and you’ll certainly want plenty of lubricant. I call the prostate his ‘Hero spot’, because it takes a hero to be adventurous, secure in his masculinity and trusting with his
partner in order to embark on Hero Spot exploration.

Hero Spot/Prostate Massage

The prostate can be effectively stimulated by the insertion of a finger or vibrator into your lover’s Rosebud/anus and rectum.

1. Lubricate your finger, or a finger cover, and insert one or two fingers, palm up, in a “come hither” motion inside his anus.

2. Apply a light pressure either tapping or stroking towards the perineum. Ask your lover what feels best. Some men say their pleasure zone is just one knuckle inside the anus; others are deeper. Levels of pleasurable response vary with each individual.

3. Be sure to ask your lover how he likes to be stroked, including what kind of pressure and motions feel best.

4. Ask him to share his feelings of pleasure, anticipation and concern and if he would like to try it again.

For example, he might say:
Before, “I’ve never done this before,” or “I’m afraid your fingernails will hurt.”
During, “I feel vulnerable,” or “Don’t stop!”
After, “That felt better than anything I ever could have imagined,” or “That felt really good.”

TriGasm for Men

The TriGasm for Men It is the result of stiimulating 3 points of pleasure; the Lingam/penis, the Jewels/testicles and the Rosebud/anus simultaneously.

1. The man should lie back while his lover lavishes the head of his Lingam with some suction until he reaches a level 8 on a pleasure scale of 1 to 10.

2. She should then use her mouth and tongue to stimulate his Jewels for 2 minutes.

3. Return to the Lingam and orally increase his level of pleasure to a 9.5 (almost to the point of no return).

4. At this peak, fondle his Jewels, continue to orally delight his Lingam and insert a forefinger palm up into his Rosebud to find his Hero Spot then tap, tap tap it gently. If all goes well, he’ll have an unforgettable, mind-blowing TriGasm.

Orgasm vs. Ejaculation

For men, the art of staying relaxed in high states of arousal actually gives more energy to orgasm. A man can have a full body orgasm without ejaculation. Practicing lovemaking without ejaculation can give increased pleasure, which may result in multiple orgasms. During these exercises, it is important to find your point of “inevitability” for ejaculation. Practice these exercises for separating your orgasm from ejaculation with and without, your lover.

1. Lie down on your back and ask your lover to begin a genital caress with her
hands or mouth.

2. You are now going to do a series of low-level pleasuring peaks on the pleasure scale of 0 to 10, with 10 being orgasm.

3. Give her feedback so she knows when to slow down or intensify her caresses.

4. Switch positions with your lover now lying on her back with her legs in the air slightly bent. In the Missionary position, reach a series of peaks while having Maithuna/intercourse.

5. Start with slow penetration and peak up to a level 5 on the pleasure scale and back off by squeezing your PC muscle.

6. Peak to level 6 and back off by squeezing the PC muscle. Slow down your breathing and open your eyes. Release sexual energy through your throat Chakra.

7. Repeat as above to level 7.

8. Repeat as above to level 8.

9. Repeat as above to level 9.

10. Thrust all the way up to just before the point of no return at level 9.5.

11. Both lovers should stop moving, the male lover squeezing his PC muscle as hard as he can. Synchronize your breathing, open your eyes and focus on each other with the intention to prolong lovemaking.

12. If you stopped thrusting in time, you will have experienced an orgasm without ejaculation.

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Excerpt from Dr. Ava’s Tantra Workbook

5 Ways Audio Porn Can Strengthen Your Relationship

audio porn
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Sex tops the list as one of the biggest issues between couples. Generally, one partner wants it more than the other. And yes, you guessed it, it’s usually the man! With sex comes intimacy and this is generally the area of the relationship women want to work on. The good news is, by improving your sex life, you can achieve both — better (hotter) sex and a deeper emotional connection.

Does this sound too good to be true? With a little effort and creativity, it can be done. Today we’re discussing how you can use audio porn to enhance your sexual pleasure, intimacy, and even communication.

Leave your inhibitions at the door and let’s start exploring the world of erotic audio sex stories.

What is Audio Porn?

As the name suggests, audio porn is erotic sex stories read aloud. Imagine your favorite erotic stories whispered into your ear by a sexy, captivating voice. Almost as powerful as dirty talk, audio porn stimulates all of your senses. Listeners can choose from categories ranging from mild (romance and mature) to wild (bondage, fetish, and threesomes). Choose whatever piques your interest, lay back, and explore your innermost desires.

But we’re talking about relationships here, right? That’s what makes audio porn so appealing. These erotic audio sex stories will take you beyond your own fantasies and help you explore your partner’s desires as well as you connect on a deeper level.

5 Ways Audio Porn Can Strengthen Your Relationship

When you think about strengthening your relationship, porn probably isn’t the first thing that comes to mind. In fact, many women are put off by the idea that their men watch porn, and men tend to sneak around, watching porn clips at work or in the bathroom.

That ends here!

Audio porn offers a shared experience that will help you see your other half in new and exciting ways that strengthen your bond both in and out of the bedroom.

A Shared Experience

Life gets busy. Between work, social obligations, friends, and kids (if you have any), you and your partner may feel like two ships passing in the night. It’s rare that you get quality time together let alone the chance to become more intimate or connect on a deeper level.

When you listen to audio porn together, it’s a shared experience you can reflect on and enjoy as a couple. The best part is, you can either listen to it side by side in bed or send each other naughty stories throughout the day. There’s something hot about all-day fire play. Send your partner a story with a message that reads, “This is what I want to do with you later”.

If listening to audio porn during the day is a no-no, wait until you’re home together in bed. Listening to audio sex stories is much less intimidating than watching pornographic films or videos. Choose a story you’re both interested in and press play. As it unfolds and the characters slowly undress, so can you!

A Way to Safely Share Fantasies

We all have fantasies but for some of us, expressing our sexual needs is much harder. Whether it’s because you’re embarrassed or simply scared of your partner’s reaction, far too many people keep their wildest fantasies to themselves.

Well, the time has come for you to tell your lover what you need and want. And audio porn can help. Carefully select a story that depicts your dream sex scenario. Maybe it’s a steamy threesome or visiting a swingers club. Listen to the story together and see how your partner reacts. Try saying something like, “That sounds hot. Would you ever do something like that?”. Even if they say no, at least you’ll feel better knowing you got it off your chest. And who knows, maybe they’ll be just as aroused by the idea as you!

Find Out What Your Partner Likes and Dislikes

Not everyone is vocal about what they like and don’t like in the bedroom. Some people go years without ever saying what their favorite sex act is or that no, they don’t like it when you pull their hair! Communication is the foundation of any healthy relationship and that starts in the bedroom.

Both partners can use audio porn to learn more about their lovers. While listening, comment on the things the characters do that you like or want to try, but also voice your dislike of certain things. You can say, “I’d love for you to do that to me but we can skip that last part.”

If your other half isn’t talking, ask telling questions. Things as simple as, “Is that something you’d like to try?” or “That sounds really hot to me. What do you think?”. By using audio porn as an ice breaker, you can learn more than you ever thought possible about your lover’s likes, dislikes, and kinky desires.

It’s Great Foreplay

Foreplay is a great way to get geared up for sex and create some pretty intense sexual build-up. Porn is a common tool used for sexual arousal. In short, it helps get you in the mood! While most men have no problem jumping right into action without much lead-in, women need a little bit more prep time.

Because some women find pornographic videos offensive or just plain corny, audio porn offers a nice alternative. The stories actually have substance, the narrator’s voices are seductive and compelling, and paired with the vivid details provided, your naughty imagination can fill in the blanks.

Help You Remain Faithful

Sadly, over 60% of men and 45% of women are unfaithful at one time or another. That means infidelity affects 1 in every 2.7 couples. One reason people stray is a lack of sexual satisfaction and excitement.

But what if you could explore your deepest sexual desires without stepping outside your relationship? Listening to audio porn is a healthy way to indulge in your naughtiest, wildest sexual fantasies without acting on them. Now, you can feel what it’s like to engage in a threesome, have sex with a stranger in public, or become someone’s sex slave. Obviously, you won’t really be having sex, but with a little creativity and imagination, you can put yourself in the character’s shoes and momentarily escape reality without being unfaithful.

Enjoy Hotter Sex, Better Communication, and a Stronger Bond with Audio Porn

Who knew that porn could be so beneficial for your relationship? Audio porn is quickly catching on as a healthy form of sexual exploration, both alone and shared with a partner.

Use these sexy erotic stories as a lead-in for expressing your desires and fantasies. You can also use it to help improve communication and as foreplay. With so many categories to choose from, there’s an erotic audio sex story to fit every need and desire. The only question that remains is which one will you choose first?

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