Wednesday, December 25, 2024

Featured - The Best Sex Education Articles for Adults

Sexpert.com has the Best Sex Education Articles for Adults from an expert line up of certified sex experts.

Top sex education for adults featured posts and sexuality articles from our sex experts, sex coaches on everything from female orgasms, sexual pleasure, alternative lifestyle topics, couples sex advice and dating advice, masturbation and sexual empowerment, sexual health and wellness including men’s sexual problems like premature ejaculation and how to last longer in the bedroom.

Our Sex Ed featured articles include all the tips and techniques you need to know to make you a better lover such as the ultimate guide to anal sex, BDSM and kinky sex, oral sex, how to have the best orgasms, sexual relationship topics on how to spice up your love life, as well as female sexual anatomy and the erogenous zones including the clitoris, the cervix and cervical orgasm, all about the g spot, female ejaculation and g spot orgasms, the vagina and the vulva, penis facts and more.

Sexpert.com is an all-inclusive sex education site for adults and has many empowering articles on gender and sexuality, as well as articles for gays, lesbians, bisexuals, transgender, sissies, and alternative lifestyles including cuckold and hotwife relationships, threesomes, polyamory and swinging. See our sacred sexuality topics including Tantra sex, yoni yoga, sexy goddess rituals, energy orgasms and more.

Explore sexpert articles from our top sex educators.

Tantric Attention: Focused Techniques to Awaken Desire

Photo by Jonathan Borba from Pexels

In Tantra, “Attention” is the follow through of “Intention” because where the attention goes, energy glows. Attention is all about being 100% present for your lover. Attention is also about focusing intently on their pleasure and sharing your emotions with each other. In the following interactive exercises you will learn how to look into your lover’s soul, and how to make love with your full focus. Attention is an essential element to experiencing Tantric bliss.

Give your lover the full attention that they deserve.

Attention Exercises with your Lover:

1. Buttocks: Caress and feather your lover’s buttocks around the crease where the buttocks and upper leg meet with a feather or your hair.

2. Feet: Massage your lovers feet with a feather, fingers, tongue or hair.

3. Toes: Blindfold your lover and kiss his/her feet. Suck on the toes as if you were kissing him/her on the mouth.

4. Thighs: Blindfold your lover and tickle the inside of your lover’s thighs with a feather, your hair or fingernails.

5. Knees: Lick behind your lover’s knees.

6. Buttocks Contact: Sit astride your lover’s back so that your Lingam or Yoni is in contact with the buttocks and rub your genitals gently over it.

7. Fingers: Massage, kiss and suck on and in between your lover’s fingers.

8. Stomach: Rub your Yoni or Lingam against your lover’s stomach.

9. Lips: Suck on your lover’s bottom lip, and then explore your lover’s mouth with your tongue.

10. Attention: Finish this sentence, “I want you to pay more attention to my…”.

11. I Want: Pay attention as I show you how and where I want to be worshiped.”

12. The TriGasm: Stimulate her Pearl, G-spot and Rosebud simultaneously using your tongue, finger, feather or Lingam for at least 6 minutes. Then stimulate his Lingam, Jewels and Hero Spot simultaneoulsy.

13. Polishing the Pearl: Lift the clitoral hood up over her Pearl and make circular motions around it (not on it) with your tongue for at least 4 minutes.

14. Kiss Her Yoni: Kiss your woman by focusing your energy on her outer and inner Yoni lips. Explore the area around her Pearl (clitoris) for 2 minutes.

15. Penis Bliss: Stroke his Lingam with your prominent hand and stimulate his Hero Spot, Rosebud and Jewels externally by sliding your knuckles back and forth over the perineum (landing strip between the Rosebud/anus and testicles). Use plenty of lube or oil and ask for verbal feedback from your man. Do this for 3 minutes.

16. Find her G-spot: Ask your woman for permission to enter her Yoni. Then gently insert your ring finger inside one and a half to two inches. Curl your finger in a “come here” motion so that you can easily locate her G-spot. It is located on the upper vaginal wall before you get to the cervix. It will feel like a small area (about the size of a dime) with ridges on it, much like the roof of your you have found it, slowly, tap, tap, tap your finger
up towards her navel as you stimulate her G-spot. Ask your lover for verbal feedback. Do this for 6 minutes and use plenty of lubricant.

10. The Venus Butterfly: Orally stimulate the Pearl until your lover is on the verge of orgasm, and then find her G-spot simultaneously. Ask her for feedback. Use lubricant if necessary.

11. Goddess Waterfall: Starting very gently, run the tip of your tongue with varying degrees of firmness like running water down one side of her outer lips from the clitoral hood to her perineum. Then tap your tongue down the same side from the hood to the perineum like the pitter-patter of mist drops in a waterfall. Exhale warmly around the outside of her Yoni as you make sounds of pleasure to convey to her how much you are enjoying honoring her.

12. Godly Waterfall: Run the tip of your tongue with varying firmness like running water up one side of the Lingam from the base to the tip and then bring your fingertips down the other side from the tip to the base like the pitter patter of mist drops in a waterfall.

Paying Attention to Your Lover

Focus on listening to your lover the next time he/she speaks to you and acknowledge what he/she said in your own words. Give your lover a Tantric massage by focusing only on his/her pleasure. Then exchange roles. When making love, keep your eyes open and look into your lovers soul. Pay attention to your lover’s needs and be 100% present when he/she needs you.

+++

Excerpt from Dr. Ava’s Tantra Workbook

A Lyon Among Feminist Adult Filmmakers: The Feminist Sexpert Interviews Jennifer Lyon Bell

https://blueartichokefilms.com/
blueartichokefilms.com

Jennifer Lyon Bell is most literally a first among equals in the world of feminist erotica; one of the first and best to capture female fantasies on film–and to great cinematic effect, as every film released through her signature production company Blue Artichoke Films is a work of sensual art.

Jennifer Lyon Bell

The Feminist Sexpert is proud to interview a feminist sex industry pioneer: Ms. Jennifer Lyon Bell.

1. For the past decade, you’ve been bringing us beautiful feminist porn films, featuring tenderness, arty visuals and compelling storylines. Tell us about your newest release, Wild Card!

Wild Card is the second in a series of “erotic game films” I’ve been making. It’s really fun. The first one, Adorn, was such a nice surprise that I wanted to make a new one with a new cast and a new game. So, in Wild Card, Bishop Black and Kali Sudhra come together in a room that has cards hidden all over it. Each card has a not-typically-sexual body part listed, like elbow. Their game is to do as much as they can with or to that body part, for as long as it’s fun, and then move onto the next card. I made sure they know they had freedom to be goofy, rough, loving, erotic —whatever they felt in the moment. And they could talk and communicate as much as they liked, in whatever way they liked. What I like about these two game films is that the performers have to get really creative about foreplay and sex itself, because they can’t just launch into the typical list of activities in a certain order that we’ve been taught to expect from mainstream films and porn movies alike. I think this is a great message — sex is creative, and as long as you and your partner feel free to be honest with each other, you can craft a sexual experience together that’s maximally enjoyable for both of you. As a bonus, Kali and Bishop are friends — not partners, just good friends — outside of the film, so they have a fondness for each other that you can sense. It’s a perfect combination of comfortableness and electric-charged clumsiness, as they find their way towards getting aroused and climaxing! (Climaxing many times, in Kali’s case).

See a preview of one of her films (Second Date VR):



2. What first inspired you to make erotic films from a woman’s point of view?

I liked porn when I first saw it, but I wished that it was a better fit for my own sexuality. As a cisgender woman myself, I felt that porn was missing some of the activities that my friends and I most enjoyed in real life, like fingering. I wanted to integrate those back in. And, although I personally like looking at people in all different gender combinations, I really missed seeing the face and body of men in mainstream porn. I think that’s why so many women watch gay porn, to really enjoy the faces and bodies of men. So I wanted to bring that back into movies as well. I expected that it was mainly women who would enjoy the films I was making. To my surprise, it became immediately clear that just as many men liked it too. They even wrote me letters about it. I’m glad that so many different kinds of viewers share my view on what’s sexy.

3. What do you feel that are the ingredients or elements of a good feminist porn film?

I think a feminist porn film involves the vision, the production practices, and the message.

Vision: the film reflects the erotic vision of a woman —or somebody who’s in a sexual minority not usually represented in mainstream porn, like trans folx

2) Production practices: the director creates on-set labor practices that are fair for cast and crew, especially including women and sexual minorities. Fair pay, time for breaks, good food, safer sex materials.

3) Message: The overall message of the film contributes positively to sexual culture. Maybe it shows gender relationships in a healthier way, or lends visibility to sexual practices we don’t often see on film, or even brings attention to an underrepresented fantasy.

4. You explored Virtual Reality in your release, Second Date. What special challenges did this present?

I loved shooting Second Date! Shooting VR, particularly 360° VR, is wholly different than shooting regular cinema. For one, the cinematic language is different. You can’t cut back-and-forth between characters, or it would make the audience disoriented and nauseated! You have to embrace that the viewer can choose to look anywhere they want. You can guide their choices, but you can’t force them. And the physical shooting situation is so different. For 360° video, you plan and light the whole set, and direct the performers, and then when shooting starts, the entire crew has to physically leave the set. You have to trust the performers intensely. Luckily for me, that’s already the way I shoot. We do a lot of advance preparation and then I very much trust the performers to do what they feel is right in the moment. VR came naturally for me. What I liked about applying virtual reality to erotic moments is that the movie gets a very real-time feel. Second date is actually a real second date between the two performers, and you can see how the real intimacy builds slowly between them, as if you were literally standing right next to them. It’s organic and intense.

5. Your films hold great crossover appeal on the indie and adult film circuits. Do you find that your work is popular with people who generally don’t enjoy porn?

Absolutely! It’s fair that there are many people who wanted to find something arousing, tried some random porn, and didn’t care for it because it didn’t meet their needs. That’s part of why I sometimes try to use alternative wording when I can, like “explicit erotic film,“ or “adult cinema,” to communicate that you might get a different experience than you would expect from a sex movie. I think the reason that I’ve been lucky to have my films run at art/indie film theaters and cinemas, as well as in more traditional porn channels, is that I’m trying to integrate emotion with sexuality, and, if possible, in a surprising way. Folks that are into art films are interested in that. There’s so much great filmmaking that we can still do that fits in between the traditional porn and traditional arthouse film genres!

That’s one reason I felt it was important to build our own Blue Artichoke Films platform. While some of my films are available on other ethical porn platforms, I wanted to create a fresh space for people who didn’t feel that it was necessarily porn. And then, at the same time, I could use the platform to open up doors for them to all kinds of sex-positive culture they might like: events like play parties and screenings nights, blog posts chatting about TV shows and sexual culture, and then of course the films themselves. It’s like an erotic community.

6. Tell me more about your public lecturing regarding film and women’s issues.

I really enjoy public speaking and I try to use my platform as a filmmaker to draw attention to issues I think are important. For one, I teach classes about erotic filmmaking to film professionals and students. They tell me that it’s very rare anyone offers them tools and suggestions for how to approach writing or directing a sex scene. No wonder there are so many sexual representations out there that are clichéd and boring! It’s gratifying to help the next generation of filmmakers with building that toolkit. I do the same when I teach my erotic filmmaking workshop, “From Fantasy To Film: Design Your Own Erotic Film.” It gives you ideas of how to dive into the emotional core of what you find personally sexy in a scene, so that you can bring it out and do it justice. In many cases, the people that take my workshop are just everyday folks who feel inspired to explore their sexuality, and the workshop becomes a space for them to get in touch with what they truly like. It’s empowering to be honest with yourself about your desires. People seem to get a lot of enjoyment and relief from these workshops.

I also do quite a bit of speaking where I show filmclips and educate folks about the wide variety of erotic ethical film that’s already out there! Most people have no idea, and I am pleased to evangelize for this genre of film.

And because feminism is the underpinning of all my filmmaking work, I’m always happy to talk about the relationship between feminism and porn, or the ways in which we as a culture could do a better job improving sexual culture by changing the way we represent sexuality in porn, mainstream movies, and advertisements.

7. What’s next for Jennifer Lyon Bell and Blue Artichoke Films?

Now that the pandemic is ending, I can’t wait to start shooting again! Fiction, experimental – the sky is the limit.

Self-Publishing & Erotica: The Cold Hard Facts-Part 2

Photo by Lisa from Pexels

Sorry to leave you hanging in the last column, spurting through a ruined handjob, left with aching clit or blue-balls. But there is lots to say about this subject, and I needed to get through part one, regale you of the prickly potential of print and the wonderfulness that is eBooks, especially for us erotic writers.

Now onto self-publishing…

As with most things I find in our dizzying digital age, there are good and bad aspects to self-publishing. The good is, you can potentially get your book out there for not so much money, little effort, while controlling pretty much every aspect of its publication. You can also set it up to see 100% of the profit from your book’s sales.

The bad?

I’m sure, to some degree, you already have this figured.

For one, you have no distribution network set-up, or if you do, it will most probably be woefully weaker than an actual publishers’. Not that you can’t create a healthy and profitable distribution network over time, you can even begin a cottage industry all on your own, but it will take a lot of time and a lot of work… unless you get exceedingly lucky.

And if you don’t think luck figures into the publishing game, as it does in lots of aspects of our lives, then you have probably not lived all that long.

And be warned, if you do indeed take this route, as most self-published books need to, promoting your book all on your own, working hard to Twitter and Twitter news about it, catch every opportunity to spread the news of its existence far and wide, you must realize (again, this is something you are probably aware of already, just not something you want to admit) that there are plenty of other writers just like you, pushing their books.

You are just one of many.

Competition is fierce, while the facility to self-promote is better than ever before.

Do I write this to discourage you? No. It’s just one of the cold hard negatives of self-publishing.

Another negative is that you will not make a ton of money or maybe any real money at all with self-publishing unless, again, you are exceedingly lucky. The good here, though, is that, because you self-publish (and hopefully do so smartly; and I’ll hit on how best to do this in a bit), your overhead is low. You don’t have to sell a lot of books to put yourself into profit. As I mentioned last time, there are tons of books by well-known authors returned to their publishers all the time. The cost for these books returned/not sold can come out of the author’s profits, advance, reputation (all 3) with his or her publisher. Printed books produced by a company and not sold and indeed returned, or put on a clearance rack, always creates ramifications.

You won’t have this problem with self-publishing.

There’s more cautions you might need to consider along the way: companies that advertise packages where they take your book through copywriting, formatting, publishing, and distribution (they are not a publisher per se but a book ‘wrangler’ ) who might rip you off in any of those areas of work they do for you; the complete waste of time and resources that could plague you as you crawl deeper and deeper down the rabbit hole of social media self-promotion; surfing through the soul-crushing criteria listed at each place/site you try and put your book up on (especially true for erotica authors) that might, in fact, get your book thrown off that list/site or call for revisions you can’t see clear to make.

But mostly you come to level the playing field when you self-publish, and as I mentioned before, the best way of doing so presently, is in eBook form.

And I will tell you all about it… in part 3. 😉

The Realities of Sexual Fantasies

Image by Сергей Катышкин from Pixabay

We All Have Sexual Fantasies

Even if you think your fantasy is weird or might freak out your partner, chances are, that your fantasy is not all that unusual. It’s a safe bet that your partner has fantasies, too.

In October 2014, a group of scientists at the University of Montreal published a study that asked 1,517 adult men and women residing in Quebec about their sexual fantasies. (How cool would it be to have that job?)

Top Female Fantasies

The study found the Top 10 fantasies among women were:

1. The location is specified: 27.2% (No. 6 for men: 11.3%)
– Exotic or unusual private place (e.g., deserted beach, swimming pool, forest): 21.4%; public place (e.g., office, restrooms, bar, aircraft, etc.): 5.8%

2. Spouse or current lover is exclusively involved: 20.1% (No. 10 for men: 7.9%)

3. Focus on own submissive behavior: 18.8% (Not reported as a Top 28 fantasy for men)

4. Specifically involves a stranger: 14.3% (No. 24 for men: 1.9%)

5. The type of ambience is specified: 11.7% (Not reported as a Top 28 fantasy for men)

6. Exhibitionism: 8.9% (No. 23 for men: 1.9%)

7. Involves homosexual activities: 8.2% (No. 7 for men: 8.2%)

8. Group sex: 7.8% (No. 9 for men – with men and women or only women: 8.1%)
– Active role with men and women: 3.9%; passive role surrounded by men: 3.9%

9. Specifically refers to an authority figure or a celebrity: 7.1% (No. 14 for men: 4.2%)

10. Involves a sexual object: 6.5%

Top Male Fantasies

The Top 10 fantasies among men were:

1. Voyeurism: 15.0% (No. 11 for women: 3.9%)
– Watching a spouse having sex with another man: 8.4%; alone, spying an unaware stranger: 3.3%; watching spouse having sex with another woman: 3.3%

2. Fetishism: 14.0% (Not reported as a Top 19 fantasy for women)

3. Threesomes: 12.6% (No. 13 for women: 3.2%)
– With strangers or acquaintances: 7.0%; with a spouse: 5.6%

4. Oral sex (non-homosexual): 11.7% (Not reported as a Top 19 fantasy for women)
– Receiver (fellatio): 10.8%; giver (cunnilingus): 3.3%

5. Anal sex (non-homosexual): 11.7% (No. 19 for women (as a receiver): 1.3%)
– Receiver (with a strap-on or shemales): 6.1%; giver with a woman: 5.6%

6. Location-specific: 11.3% (No. 1 with women: 27.2%)
– Exotic or unusual private place (e.g., deserted beach, swimming pool, forest): 7.5%; public place (e.g., office, restaurant, bar, aircraft): 3.8%

7. Homosexual activities: 8.9% (No. 7 for women: 8.2%)

8. Involves an acquaintance: 8.5% (No. 18 for women: 1.3%)

9. Group sex (with men and women or only women): 8.1% (No. 8 for women: 7.8%)
– Active role: 7.5%; passive role: 0.6%

10. Spouse or current lover is exclusively involved: 7.9% (No. 2 for women: 20.1%)

What Fantasies are Typical?

In all, five sexual fantasies in the study were statistically typical and endorsed by more than 84.1% of participants — feeling romantic emotions during a sexual relationship, fantasies in which atmosphere and location are important, and fantasies involving a romantic location; receiving oral sex, and having sexual intercourse with two women. Among the remaining sexual fantasies, 23 were common in men and 11 were common in women.

What Fantasies are Rare?

On the opposite end of the spectrum, two sexual fantasies were found to be statistically rare (endorsed by 2.3% or less of participants) — having sex with a child under the age of 12 (0.8% of women and 1.8% of men) and having sex with an animal (3% of women and 2.2% of men). Among the 53 sexual fantasies studied in the survey, nine were statistically unusual (endorsed by 15.9% or less of participants) — seven for women (urinating on partner, 3.5%; being urinated on, 3.5%; wearing clothes of the opposite gender, 6.9%; forcing someone to have sex, 10.8%; abusing a person who is drunk, asleep, or unconscious, 10.8%; having sex with a prostitute, 12.5%; and having sex with a women who has very small breasts, 10.8%) and four for men (urinating on partner, 8.9%; being urinated on, 10.0%; having sex with two other men, 15.8%; having sex with more than three other men, 13.1%).

“Many fantasies that one might suspect would be unusual are, in fact, endorsed by a significant portion of individuals,” says Dr. Richard Krueger, MD, an associate clinical professor of psychiatry at Columbia University College of Physicians and Surgeons in New York City who was not a researcher that was part of the study. “Yet this doesn’t mean that these are pathological at all. It just means that people have them. The only way that it becomes pathological is if it involves distress, dysfunction, or action on a non-consenting person.”

Does it Mean You Want it in Real Life?

While many women who took part in the survey expressed more extreme fantasies, especially of submission and domination by a stranger, they say that they never want these fantasies to come true. However, the majority of men that took part in the survey have more fantasies than women, express them much more vividly, and would love their fantasies to come true, especially threesomes.

But let’s say that you have a fantasy your partner doesn’t want to act out, let alone talk about, or if you don’t have currently have a partner. Perhaps you have a fantasy that will never play out in your life or is socially taboo.

“Having (fantasies) does not automatically translate into wanting to act them out,” says Michael Wiederman, a professor of psychology at Columbia College in South Carolina. “Perhaps it’s the assumption that fantasies say something about desired behavior that leads some people to feel guilty about their sexual fantasies. However, by definition, fantasies are safe (no one is actually hurt in real life) and they can end the way the fantasizer desires. Conversely, attempts to act out fantasies frequently result in less than desirable experiences. So, as long as your fantasies remain just that, you can give yourself permission to enjoy that aspect of your sexuality without guilt or concern about normality.”

Previously Published at: http://agoodwomansdirtymind.com/the-realities-of-fantasies/

Why You Should Attend A Cuddle Party

I love, love, love the energy and healing I get from attending a Cuddle Party.  I hear so many different things about the experience and I can firsthand tell you that the experience you have is up to you.  First, no one is having sex at a Cuddle Party. There are boundaries that are adhered to by all attendees. There are some rules and they are respected. I have never had a negative event, so I am a fan of cuddling.

I want to become a facilitator for Cuddling Parties.  It takes training and there is a foundation that offers a weekend program that includes coaching, CPR, and facilitator skills. I would love to add this to my resume of services that I offer my clients.  A cuddle/puddle is an experience designed to allow people to experience non-sexual, group physical intimacy through cuddling.  Of course, you must ask permission and receive an energetic yes before you touch anyone. You can change your mind at any time. You don’t have to cuddle anyone at a Cuddle Party, ever.

The environment is cozy, and the pleasure comes from the release of oxytocin! It helps when there is soft music and munchies.  It is necessary to tell you that there should be no intoxicants. The only high should be natural.  You should be clear-minded and open to receiving the energy from the puddle. At the end of the event, there is a closing “ceremony” that includes a conversation of thoughts from the event.  As a facilitator, I love the thought of helping individuals open themselves up from the benefits of Cuddle Parties.

Photo by Ketut Subiyanto from Pexels

Participants are often in a state of cuddle intoxication at the end. Feeling a sense of connection with the group that they never would have anticipated at the beginning of the event.  Folks are free to exchange hugs, phone numbers and receive thank you’s from the facilitator for making the cuddle party special. I think that could be so fulfilling. So here is what I have experienced at cuddle parties that may sway you to try it. The first thing you do is change into pajamas.

Oh, and clothing matters.  Wear something that is not risqué. Something comfortable not sexy.  Think no lace, no shorts but drawstrings. Bring a pillow or anything that makes you feel safe and comfortable. There was no liquor, and everyone seemed lucid.  There was sparkling cider and water to go with fruit and crackers.  The setup was very calm and inviting. We sat in a circle until we began to connect with others.

We created a welcome circle where we were all welcomed to create the structure and safe space for socializing. We were able to introduce ourselves and we played a get to know you game that allowed me to sync with the environment.  We were taught the cuddle party philosophy. What I saw was participants cuddling in groups, as two and some talked and didn’t cuddle at all.  We were told that we could feel free to be feet against feet, give full-body hugs, head rubs, spooning… it really was up to me to decide what I wanted from the group.  I had the best head rubs! It was relaxing and I must admit, I slept better.

All during the experience, the facilitator participated with us.  Encouraging us to feel relaxed and supported and having a great time. I got oriented to the rules as we moved through a very organized process of exchanging energy and staying in the moment.  I felt comfortable to cuddle in my comfort and I carried on a few great conversations with other participants. Lying down while being held allowed me to fall into my thoughts and feel safe to explore what was heavy on my mind. Some self-reflection so to speak.

As I write this, I am getting excited about being a facilitator. I am that happy with my experiences, I want to offer this to others. Cuddle Parties serve a purpose. As an Orgasm Coach, I believe attending a Cuddle Party will give clients an opportunity to feel something different. To learn something about themselves sexually. To experience something that is pleasurable, but not sexual. is an experience.  Cuddle Parties happen all over, you can invite one into your home by finding a facilitator in your area.  You have got to find a Cuddle Party in your area.  I hope reading this you will find yourself wanting to play.

Taking the Job Out of Blow Jobs: 16 Oral Sex Tips

Image by Anja from Pixabay

I wrote about how to give the best blow job ever a couple of years ago. It’s been the top article on my blog ever since. But when I looked back on the original article, I felt it was lacking a lot of specific details at least to my standards.

So what’s the secret of taking the job out of blow job? Here are some of my favorite tips…

  1. As your man is getting undressed, lie on the bed with your head where your feet usually go, rather than perched on the pillows. As he walks toward the bed, slide down so your head is hanging over the bed, grab his buttocks, and take his penis into your mouth. Your head should be off the bed as you give him oral sex upside down. He’s ultimately in control of the thrusting, but you can use your hands as a guide to speed him up or slow him down. Not only does this look sexy, but it also opens your throat wide so you can take in more of him without gagging.

2. Lift his penis to expose his testicles, then find the tiny, sometimes darker line that runs up between them. Start a long lick from the underside of his testicles and continue very slowly to the tip of his penis.

3. Cover your teeth with your lips and then take as much of his penis in your mouth as you can in one movement. You don’t have to deep throat him; just let him see his penis disappear rapidly. If he really likes for you to go down deep, aim his penis downward instead of toward the back of your mouth. If it takes you a while to master that move, try using an oral sex spray to help numb your throat.

4. Use one hand to hold the base of the penis and let saliva pool in your mouth to keep your tongue slippery. Make a loose fist with your other hand, lube it up, and slide it up and down his penis, closing it when you reach the head. Get the hand motion right first, then add your mouth, letting your hand act as an extension of it. Create a snug vacuum with your mouth as if it’s a tight vagina and then slide up and down with your hand following your mouth.

5. Spice up any oral technique by adding some “twist and swirl” action with your tongue. The combination of firm fingers and a soft tongue feels fantastic, and it’s easy to master. As if you’re using your hand to masturbate him, twist it slightly once it reaches the head. At the same time, swirl the flat of your tongue around the rim of the head.

6. Use a tensed tongue to flick on his frenulum, the band of skin between his head and the foreskin or shaft, or make like a butterfly and flutter the flat surface of your tongue on it.

7. A nickel- to quarter-sized dollop of flavored lube will make sucking much more fun and enjoyable as well as keeping his shaft slippery if you alternate between playing his skin flute with your mouth and your hands.

8. Keep your tongue moving. Alternate between active, slow and sensual tongue moves. Think of giving a blow job as something like playing free-form jazz or even a symphony. Changing the tempo as you go along keeps things interesting and more fun for givers as well as receivers.

9. Don’t just limit your attention to his shaft while going down on him. Some guys like when the person sucking them off pulls down tight on the penis at the base of the shaft. Or try cupping or massaging his balls. Don’t neglect licking and sucking his balls, too.

10. Perineum, prostate and anal play are great ways to double up on the wow factor during fellatio. Stick a finger, dildo, anal plug or prostate massager up his ass while you’re giving his shaft some mouth or tongue action. If you or he aren’t big fans of anal play, press on his perineum to stimulate his prostate gland for an extra orgasmic jolt.

11. Men are totally into visuals. Bob your head up and down when you’re going down on him.

12. Eye contact is hot, too, and something I’ll admit that I totally forget about when I’m focused on giving oral pleasure.

13. Humming and moaning are hot for men, too, especially for the vibration.

14. If he’s squirming and trying to hump your face, do more of whatever you’re doing. Listen to what he wants, even if it means discerning the changes in his moans, body movements and any other non-verbal cues.

15. No matter what techniques you use, make sure that you complete the job. In other words, don’t quit or peter out before he’s had a chance to come.

16. Several of the men I’ve talked to over the years about giving head have said one of the things they enjoy most is when their partner enjoys giving oral sex. Be an animal and not a machine. Giving great oral sex isn’t all about technique. Enthusiasm goes a long way, too.

Previously Published at: http://agoodwomansdirtymind.com/taking-the-job-out-of-blow-jobs/

Sexy Sounds: Aural Sex Tantric Style

Photo by Yaroslav Shuraev from Pexels

Tantric Sounds

Sound releases energy and during lovemaking, sounds release sexual energy. Sound will also amplify sensation, as the sound waves vibrate throughout the body. If you hold back the sounds you feel inside, it will manifest into inhibitions, resentments and anger. So for your own good health, give yourself permission to express yourself through words, sounds, sighs, cries, shouts and laughter.

In the following interactive sound exercises you will learn how to communicate through humming, the sounds of sex and how to articulate your sexual wants, needs and fears. Sound is an essential element to experiencing Tantric bliss.

Making love without sound is like watching a movie on mute.

The Sound of Your Chakras

Each Chakra has its own sound and when you chant the matching sound or Mantra, you will energize, empower and open each Chakra. Make it a ritual to ‘voice activate’ each of your Chakras every day. This exercise should be done facing your lover. Synchronize your chanting for at least five minutes.

Root: Place your hand upon your perineum (the strip between the Rosebud/anus and the Jewels/testicles on men and the strip between the Rosebud/anus and the Yoni/vagina on women). Squeeze your sphincter mus- cles and chant ‘Lam, Lam, Lam, Lam.’

Sacral: Place your hand over your sacral (sexual organs) and as you chant, squeeze your Love Muscles/ PC muscles (the muscle you use to stop the flow of urine) and chant ‘Vam, Vam, Vam, Vam’.

Solar Plexus: Place your hand over your navel. Inhale and exhale feeling your belly expand and chant Ram, ‘Ram, Ram, Ram.’

Heart: Place your hand over your heart and chant ‘Yam, Yam, Yam, Yam’.

Throat: Place your hand around your throat and chant ‘Ham, Ham, Ham, Ham’.

Third Eye: Place your hand in between your eyebrows and chant ‘Oooh, Oooh, Oooh, Oooh’.

Crown: Place your hand on top of your head and chant ‘Mmm, Mmm, Mmm, Mmm’.

Creative Visualization

This time place your prominent hand over your lovers Chakras, chant the matching sound while visualizing the color of the Chakra with your eyes closed.

Chakra Sound/Mantra
Root
Sacral
Solar Plexus
Heart
Throat
Third Eye
Crown
Lam
Vam
Ram
Yam
Ham
Ooooh
Mmm

 

Tantric Colors & Visualizations

Root: Visualize a deep red color. Red represents physical strength, vitality and stability.

Sacral: Visualize a bright orange color. Orange is associated with warm creative energy that nourishes us.

Solar Plexus: Visualize a golden yellow color. Yellow stimulates the emotions and enhances our power within.

Heart: Visualize a crisp, green color. Green represents life, nourishment, balance and harmony.

Throat: Visualize a sky blue color. Blue is associated with peace, calm, confidence and clarity.

Third Eye: Visualize an indigo color. Indigos’ deep color represents positive, intuitive strength.

Crown: Visualize a violet color. Violet is the regal color of your higher power and it represents acceptance and understanding of the Universe.

Sound Exercises with your Lover

1. Mmm: Tell your lover what sounds you want to hear during lovemaking.

2. Yes: Tell your lover what words you want to hear during lovemaking.

3. Oooh: Pretend you are building up to having a climax and make those sounds for your lover to hear.

4. Turn-on: Tell your lover 2 of your greatest turn-ons.

5. Turn-off: Tell your lover 1 sexual turnoff.

6. Fantasy: Whisper a sexual fantasy that you have in your lover’s ear.

7. Blend: Hold each other, close your eyes and blend the sounds of love for 2 minutes.

8. My Body: Tell your lover what parts of your body you love the most.

9. Position: Tell your lover your favorite sexual position and why.

10. Worship: Ask your lover how he/she wants to be worshiped and then comply.

11. Lover’s Appreciation: Exchange a physical, an appreciative and an emotional compliment with each other. (An emotional compliment is one that let’s your lover know that they are making a difference in your life and it makes the heart sing).

12. Name that Yoni/Lingam: Name each other’s genitals in a way that honors your lover’s sacred sexuality. If they already have a name, give them a new nickname.

13. Tantric Lovemaking: Get into Yab Yum position or Missionary position and simulate the movements and sounds of making love. Use moans, whispers, panting, giggling, growling and heavy breathing. This can be done dressed or naked.

14. Happy Sighs: Get into Yab Yum position or Missionary position and hold each other cheek to cheek, then sigh gently, lovingly into each other’s ears for 2 minutes. Express yourselves through the sound of your sighs and the touch of your bodies only.

15. Yoni/Lingam Talk: If your Lingam or Yoni could talk, what would it say? Have a conversation between the Lingam and Yoni to discuss what you want sexually from each other.

16. Sexual Hum: Put your mouth over one of your lover’s erogenous zones; navel, breasts, buttocks, Lingam or Yoni; their choice. Make sensual humming sounds combined with breathing for 2 minutes. Let him/her feel the vibrations of your sexual energy.

17. Share a Fantasy: Start telling your lover about a sexual fantasy that you have, and after 2 minutes your lover must finish the fantasy.

18. Memorable Erotica: Look at your lover and finish this sentence: “The most memorable erotic experience that I have ever had with you was when we….”

19. Significance: Ask your lover to name 3 of the most significant times in your relationship. Then share your most significant times with your lover.

20. Lovable: Tell your lover what makes him/her so lovable for at least 2 minutes. Then it’s his/her turn to tell you what makes you so lovable.

21. Rate your Erogenous Zones: Blindfold your lover and then kiss 4 major erogenous zones (such as lips, ears, nipples, Yoni, Lingam, testicles). Ask your lover to rate them from 1 to 10 with 10 being the most pleasurable. Do this for 2 minutes.

22. Finger Licking Good: Blindfold your lover. Suck on each one of his/her fingers in slow motion. Make the kinds of sounds you would make when you are enjoying a delicious meal. Feel free to exaggerate with slurps and sensual noises.

Sing Like No-one Is Listening!

Hum to yourself every day, say words you find embarrassing out loud, sing like no-one is listening, make love without restraining your sounds.

Chant OHM (for the crown Chakra to open), AH (for the heart Chakra to open) and HOM (for the sex Chakra to open). This chant will unite these physical areas.

Practice asking your lover for what you need, compliment your lover and praise him/her when they do something you enjoy. Don’t hold back resentments, communicate hurt feelings and create closure with your lover.

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Excerpt from Dr. Ava’s Tantra Workbook

Tantra Sex Positions & Movement for Tantric Bliss

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Tantra Sex Positions & Movement for Tantric Bliss

The lack of movement can leave your body feeling tight and tired. It also restricts energy flow and can block emotions; especially sexual ones. Even when you visualize parts of your body moving, you are creating physiological sensations.

In the following interactive exercises you will experience moving different parts of your body with your lover. The physical connection will be different than the standard lovemaking positions you may have experienced in the past. Some of the movements will be playful, while others will be spiritual or sexual. Movement is an essential element to reaching Tantric bliss.

Movement Exercises with your Lover

1. Pelvic Circles: Do circles with your pelvis while standing facing your lover for 2 minutes. Play music if you like.

2. Finger Talk: Touch each other’s face in slow motion with fingertips and communicate only through your eyes and fingers for 2 minutes.

3. Tantric Dance: Hold each other close and move your entire bodies, but not your feet for 2 minutes (add music if you like).

4. Tantric Hug: Put your arms around each other, bury your head in each others neck and press your bodies together for 2 minutes.

5. Tantric Kiss: Press your bodies together and kiss passionately for 2 minutes.

6. Eyelid Kiss: Lick your lover’s eyelids and kiss his/her eyelids tenderly.

7. Dominate: Dominate your lover by holding him/her down and kiss and caress him/her wherever you want to.

8. Striptease: Do a striptease for your lover and take off two pieces of clothing.

9. Feather: Use the feather on your own body and show your lover where it turns you on the most.

10. Rock the Cradle: Get into Yab Yum position or kneel in front of each other. Embrace. Breathe together, eye-gaze and rock your pelvis back and forth together at the same time. As you breathe in, the belly fills up and you both rock back. The belly expands from breath. As you exhale you rock towards each other. Do this exercise for 2 minutes.

11. Sensate Focus: Take turns showing your lover how you want to be touched on your face and neck. Now your lover should emulate the same touches that you just showed him/her. Give each other verbal feedback (you may use a feather or a blindfold to heighten this experience). Do ‘Sensate Focus’ for 2 minutes. Add music if you like.

12. Surrender: Take turns receiving loving caresses and kisses from your lover for 2 minutes.

13. Body Worship: Worship your lover’s body by caressing him/her with the feather or your hair followed by baby kisses. Both of you should make sounds of love and move in unison to the rhythm of your foreplay.

14. Yin Yang Kissing: Decide who will be Yin and who will be Yang. The Yang (active lover) has to explore with his/her tongue the Yin’s mouth (receptive lover) until he/she has kissed for at least 2 minutes. Then exchange roles for 2 more minutes.

15. Hand Dancing: Rub your (own) hands together and feel the warm energy as you slowly bring them apart, then put your hands against your lover’s hands and feel the heat/energy as you hand dance together. Decide who will be Yin (follower) and who will be Yang (initiator). Yin must follow Yang’s movements, keep your hands pressed up against each others for 1 minute, and then Yang must follow Yin’s movements for 1 minute.

16. Standing Cradle Rock: Stand in front of your lover with hands on hips, feet pointing ahead. Bend knees slightly and rock your pelvis cradle (back and forth) in slow motion. Go in circles, then side to side for 2 minutes simultaneously. Have fun with this and play music.

17. The Pelvis Roll: This is a variation on the ‘Missionary’ position with the man on his knees while his lover raises her knees and rests her feet on his chest. The woman has her arms and hands free to caress herself or her man. During penetration, she can roll her pelvis up and down so that his Lingam can stimulate her G-spot. The woman must surrender herself to complete and utter Tantric pleasure. Use lubricant if necessary.

18. The Swooping Goddess: This is a variation on the ‘Woman On Top’ position. She is on top with her feet on the bed or ground and her toes pointed for extra elevation. The woman needs to have strong legs for this position because she is doing all the thrusting (swooping) down on her man while he lays back, surrenders and receives. Her hands are free to caress herself or her man. Use lubricant if necessary.

19. The Crouching Tigress: This is a variation on the rear entry position. The woman gets on all fours and crouches like a wild cat with her buttocks raised high, while her man presses his lower body against her on his knees. He has the freedom to hold onto her buttocks, hips or waist. This position gives the man complete power to penetrate his lover. If the strokes are too deep and fast it may cause her discomfort, so to enhance the pleasure for both man and woman, he should thrust his Lingam into her Yoni ever so slowly and then work up to a more rapid penetration as and when she desires it. Use lubricant if necessary.

20. Enhanced Tantric Kiss: Get into Yam Yum Position. Begin your kiss by tracing the outline of your lover’s lips. Then take your lover’s bottom lip between the two of yours and suck gently. Next, wrap your lips around your lover’s tongue and suck on it with passion. Finally get a cube of ice and put it in your mouth as you kiss your lover. Continue to kiss until the ice has melted. This exercise is even more fun during Maithuna/intercourse.

21. Sixty Nine: Decide who will be Yang (on top) and who will be Yin (on bottom) and get into the classic sixty nine position. The woman gently tugs her man’s scrotum while sucking his Lingam from the base to the glans (head) changing her rhythm to long, slow sucking to short, fast milking motions. Simultaneously, the man nuzzles his face into his woman’s Yoni and licks her labia and Pearl/clitoris while stroking her perineum (between the Rosebud/anus and the Yoni opening) for at least 5 minutes.

22. Animals: Get into an animal pose with your lover and make the sounds and movements of your chosen animal. You can be a snake and slither all over your lover, a monkey who playfully explores his/her lover, a cat who snuggles, or any other animal you choose. Play with each other for 2 minutes and guess what animal your lover chose.

23. Musical Instrument: Imagine you are a musician, choose an instrument, and play a rhythm on your lover’s body for 2 minutes. You can play a concerto up and down your lover’s body, stand them up and pretend to play the cello or just get down and dirty with your lover’s flute. The choice is yours.

Connect Each Day

Hold hands, hug your lover every day. Cuddle at bedtime. Stretch your body, take a walk at least once a week and dance whenever possible with your lover. Caress your own body, discover your own erogenous zones, then do the same with your lover and ask him/her to rate their erogenous zones from 1-10.

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Excerpt from: Dr. Ava’s Tantra Workbook

31 Valuable Vagina Facts

For as fascinated as society is with sex and the female body, you’d think we’d be better informed about the vagina. A 2010 Cosmo poll found that 60% of women didn’t know a lot about their vaginas. (I’m convinced that 60% of the people that write for Cosmo don’t know much about the vagina, too.) Heavens knows how many men don’t know much about the love canal. Knowing it and understanding it can lead to better sex and health.

There’s a lot of know and learn about the vagina. That’s why I broke down this adult sex education lesson about the vagina into 31 little mini-lessons so it would be a lot easier and a lot more fun to take in.

Being Anatomically Correct

1. The first and most important thing to know is that the vagina is an internal structure. The outer portion of a woman’s privates is called the vulva, which includes the outer labia (the labia majora). The inner and or usually concealed parts include the inner labia (the labia minora), the clitoral hood, the clitoris, the urethra and the vagina.

2. The average length of an unaroused vagina in a mature woman is between 2.5 and 3 inches wide and 3.5 inches long. The vagina can expand up to 200% during sexual intercourse and giving birth.

3. Inside the vagina is a series of ridges produced by folds of the vagina called the vaginal reggae. They allow the vagina to extend and stretch.

4. The vagina is tilted at roughly a 130-degree angle. That will change with time if it hasn’t already. The vaginal angle flattens a bit, which may make vaginal intercourse feel different to women as they age and go through menopause.

5. Both sharks and vaginas have a substance called squalene. Squalene exists in shark livers and is also a natural vaginal lubricant. No wonder why people are so into Shark Week on the Discovery Channel! #SharkPorn!

About Those Smells, Discharges and Lubrication

(Yeah, I know, some of this stuff is unpleasant and uncomfortable to talk about, but it’s important to know in order to be sexually healthy.)

6. A woman’s vagina is designed to clean itself. Douching is completely unnecessary and can actually do more harm than good. In fact, most physicians discourage douching. The vagina has colonies of mutually symbiotic flora and microorganisms that protect against dangerous microbes. Disrupting this balance can cause yeast infections and abnormal discharge. After menstruation, it cleans itself out and continues to do so throughout a woman’s monthly cycle. It also will clean itself out after sex. However, a funky smell or discharge is usually a sign of a yeast or bacterial infection. These can usually be treated with over-the-counter creams.

7. While vaginal discharge keeps the vagina lubricated, it’s different from the vaginal lubrication produced during sex. The lube comes from special, pea-sized ducts called Bartholin’s glands, which are located around the vaginal opening.

8. Vaginal discharge does not contain any waste products. It contains fluid that seeps through the walls of the vagina, cervical mucus, uterine and tubal fluid, secretions from glands in the vulva, oil and sweat from vulvar glands, old cells from the walls of the vagina, and healthy bacteria. Vaginal discharge contains mostly salt water, mucus, and cells.

9. The average amount of vaginal discharge a woman of reproductive age secretes over a period of eight hours is ¼ teaspoon. Every woman makes different amounts of vaginal discharge, though it varies depending on where a woman is in her cycle. A woman procures the greatest amount of discharge, about 0.40 teaspoon, around the time of ovulation.

10. The vagina signals when it’s baby making time. The cervical mucus during ovulation gets clear, rubbery and stretchy.

11. Each vagina has its own smell. The smell depends on a variety of factors, including the combination of normal bacteria that live in the vagina, diet, types of fabric a woman wears, level of hygiene, how much a woman sweats, and gland secretions.

12. Bacterial vaginosis (BV) causes the classic fishy smell in a vagina and is sometimes associated with discharge, odor, pain, itching and burning. Researchers don’t fully understand how a woman develops BV, but know it is associated with an imbalance of the bacteria that are normally found in a woman’s vagina. Increased risk includes having a new sex partner or multiple partners and douching. A woman cannot get BV from toilet seats, bedding, or swimming pools. Women who have never had sex can also be affected.

13. Sitting in a wet bathing suit or sweaty workout underwear can give you a yeast infection. So can drinking a lot of alcohol or eating a ton of sugar. Being on antibiotics can kill off good bacteria in your vagina and cause an imbalance that is hospitable to the fungus. Eating yogurt with live cultures may help restore that balance.

14. Vaginas have can different smells at different times of the day. Right out of the shower, a vagina may not smell. After running or exercise, a vagina might smell musky from all the sweat glands. A menstruating vagina may smell like iron, and when a vagina has an overgrowth of yeast, it may smell like bread. After intercourse, a vagina may smell faintly like bleach, as semen has a smell of its own. If there is an overgrowth of bacteria, the vagina may smell like fish.

15. There are ways to make a vagina smell fresher without douching. Tactics include removing pubic hair; wiping with baby wipes instead of toilet paper, going panty-free or wearing cotton panties, avoiding panty hose and tight jeans, and eating a vegetable-based diet. Eating lots sweet fruits like pineapple or drinking cranberry juice will make it taste and smell sweeter, which can be great for your partner when they are going downtown. Probiotic foods like yogurt help to keep the vagina smelling fresh, too. Foods such as coffee, asparagus, beets, alcohol, broccoli, onions, garlic, and curry can make your va-jay-jay smell funky.

16. Sweating “down there” isn’t only normal; it provides a necessary function. Just below the skin of the labia and clitoral hood are hundreds of tiny glands that secrete oil and sweat. This can protect your delicate areas from friction and overheating.

Female Ejaculation

17. Female ejaculation DOES exist! Women, in addition to men, can ejaculate varying amounts of fluid during orgasm. It can be a few drops or enough to soak through a large section of a mattress. This is not an urban legend. I can personally attest this can happen. Some skeptics, even clinical researchers say that the ejaculate that comes from a woman isn’t actually ejaculate at all, but urine. However, I can tell you from first-hand experience it is not pee. There are other scientist that say that the components of female ejaculate are separate and different than the ones found in urine and comes from the paraurethral ducts, not the bladder. So, whenever the medical and scientific communities can pull their heads out of their asses and stick them into some vaginas to give us some definitive answers, I’ll be one of the first to let you know if this happens in my lifetime.

More Vagina Facts

18. Birth control pills can have an effect on how wet you get. So can breastfeeding and menopause. That’s because the vagina’s ability to lubricate is partially tied to estrogen levels. The lower your estrogen levels, the harder it is to get wet naturally. Using lube will help and it can even make sex more enjoyable even if you don’t need it.

19. A vaginal fart, also called a “queef,” is common. It often happens when the vagina contracts after penetration or sexual arousal. Unlike gas expelled from the rectum, which contains fecal waste and has an odor, vaginal flatulence is odorless and unrelated to the rectum.

20. It’s possible for a woman to develop an allergy to the proteins in semen. This condition is known as human seminal plasma protein hypersensitivity. Most cases only involve itching and swelling after sex, but in some cases it can be life threatening. Research shows that certain women are allergic to certain men but not to others.

21. Feel like you have to pee during sex? Sometimes a male partner might be stimulating the urethra or bladder during sex, which can make you feel like you have to pee. There’s also a thing called nerve cross-talk. It’s what happens when there’s so much is going on down there that your nerves can become confused about what exactly it is they’re experiencing when you get aroused.

22. Vaginas can get saggy. Pregnancy, childbirth, age, hormonal changes, genetics and years of gravity can weaken the supports of the female genital tract. Doing kegel exercises and using kegel balls, maintaining a normal weight, avoiding constipation, and not smoking are some ways to keep your vagina fit and healthy. So does having sex. Like the rest of your muscles, the vagina needs to be used and exercised or it will become weak and brittle. During prolonged periods of abstinence, the delicate tissues inside will thin and can begin to break down. Regular sex, however, will help keep a woman’s genitals in peak form. If you don’t have a sex partner or a male sex partner, this is when dildos aren’t just toys. They’re essential for your health as well as pleasure.

23. A woman’s vagina can fall out and hang between the legs. It’s a condition known as pelvic or vaginal prolapse. It happens when the uterus, ovaries, fallopian tubes or vagina (or a combination of all of these) moves downward from its natural place in the body. This condition is common following surgeries such as hysterectomies, but can also happen without any prior event. In severe cases, this medical condition will cause the inner tissues to protrude through the vaginal opening. In most cases, it can be fixed.

24. Painful sex (dyspareunia) is normal after a woman loses her virginity. But if the pain does not lessen and resolve after a while, other conditions may be involved, including vulvar vestibulitis (inflammation of the vestibule), vaginismus (involuntary contraction of the vaginal muscles), allergic reactions to things such as latex condoms or spermicide, and endometriosis (when lining from the uterus gets on the ovaries, bowel, and pelvic lining). As women age, lower levels of estrogen can cause atrophic vaginitis, or thinning of the vagina.

It’s also common for women to occasionally and unpredictably feel pain while having sex like if your partner rams your cervix, if the fit is too tight, you aren’t quite lubricated enough, or during or even a few days after rough or aggressive penetration. This can often be remedied by finding a more comfortable position, using lube, or getting your partner to spend a little more time getting you aroused.

The Vagina is Pleasure!

25. The first inch or two of the vagina has the most nerve endings and is the most pleasure receptive.

26. The G-spot (Grafenberg spot) lies two to three inches inside the vagina, on the anterior wall (near the belly button), just under the urethra. Researchers believe this area has a different texture than the rest of the vagina because it may be a remnant prostate gland.

27. Increasing evidence suggests that the G-spot feels good because it lies right over a deep part of the clitoris. Although experts describe the G-spot as being inside the vagina on the anterior wall, just under the urethra, the crura of the clitoris actually runs right there.

28. The A-spot is a tender bit of tissue at the end of the vagina, just in front of the cervix. You can find it past the G-spot along the upper wall of the vagina almost to the cervix. The A-spot produces lubrication and orgasmic contractions. The recommended technique is to stimulate it, along with the G-spot, in long strokes on a regular basis to build up the response in the area.

29. Guys, because a woman’s vagina expands 200% when she’s aroused, this is why it pays to take your time during foreplay. When your lady is aroused before penetration, you’ll get to go a lot deeper and she’ll be much more comfortable during sex.

Vagina Crazy Facts

30. Vaginas are strong enough to clamp down on penises. This is known as penis captivus. This can happen intercourse when the muscles in the vagina clamp down on the penis so intensely that makes it impossible for the penis to withdraw from the vagina. This usually subsides when a woman is no longer aroused. It’s a pretty rare occurrence.

31. People get things stuck in their vaginas sometimes. Actually, often. Crazy but true! The most common items that get stuck are condoms and tampons, which can be tough to retrieve on your own. If this happens to you, and you can’t get whatever it is out by yourself, go to your doctor, urgent care or to the ER. Leaving things in for long periods of time can cause infections or injury.

Previously Published at: http://agoodwomansdirtymind.com/31-valuable-vagina-facts/

100 Questions to Ask Before You Make a Commitment

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Anyone who is planning on getting married should ask their significant other these important questions before getting hitched. It can give them the opportunity to discuss any potential problems before they occur. Here’s my list of 100 questions you could ask your spouse to be before getting hitched.

Questions you should ask your potential long-term partner:

  1. What is the worst thing a lover could do or say to you?
  2. Which role-playing fantasy would turn you on the most? Master & slave, biker & slut, nurse & patient or Hooker & John.
  3. What qualities are you looking for in a lover?
  4. Prioritize what is most important in your life; work, family, spirituality, friends, money, health?
  5. What is your definition of love, intimacy & sex?
  6. What is your most precious possession?
  7. Do you approve or disapprove of learning different sexual techniques from experts who author books or DVD’s?
  8. List the best qualities you have to bring to a relationship.
  9. What would you like to improve about yourself?
  10. Name 3 of the most significant times in your life.
  11. Do you think you need to make any personal improvements in yourself? If so, what?
  12. What are your biggest fears about marriage?
  13. What is one life lesson you would like to share with your partner?
  14. What is your definition of intimacy?
  15. What would you do if you and your lover had a mismatched sex drive?
  16. What is your definition of a romantic evening?
  17. What questions could you ask them to get to know them more intimately?
  18. Describe yourself in one word?
  19. Who or what do you love?
  20. What do you feel is the biggest success you have achieved in your life?
  21. How many times have you been in love?
  22. Would you rather your lover was funny, seductive, smart or nurturing?
  23. How would you like your lover to dress in order to light your fire?
  24. How would you get them in the mood for lovemaking?
  25. When do you feel most vulnerable?
  26. What lessons have you learned from past relationships?
  27. What is a relationship deal-breaker for you?
  28. Do you like a lover to talk erotically in bed?
  29. What was your most embarrassing relationship moment?
  30. Name 2 crushes that you admire and why.
  31. What is your favorite part of your body?
  32. How do you think potential partners perceive you at first glance?
  33. What’s your favorite sexual activity?
  34. What makes you believe that you are ready for marriage?
  35. What one word would you use to describe your sexual personality?
  36. Would you say that you are a good lover, average lover or below average lover and what would it take to make you a great lover?
  37. What turns you off sexually?
  38. Is there any sexual act that you will not perform?
  39. What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?
  40. What’s the most hurtful criticism you’ve ever received?
  41. List 2 things that a potential partner could do or say that annoys you.
  42. Are you fanatical about anything?
  43. Do you have a pet name for any intimate part of your body?
  44. What do you feel is the biggest failure or drawback you have ever experienced?
  45. Can you overlook anything from your future lover’s past?
  46. Do you have any deal breakers that would prevent you from getting married?
  47. Do you have any sexual inhibitions?
  48. What is the wildest sexual encounter you have experienced?
  49. Where does sex rank in life’s priorities for you?
  50. What are your biggest strengths?
  51. What are your weaknesses?
  52. Have you ever regretted being intimate with someone?
  53. Finish this sentence: I wish my lover would…
  54. How would you feel about having a three-way in a foreign country?
  55. Name 3 sexual activities that turn you on the most.
  56. What do you love most about a lover?
  57. What do you love about yourself the most?
  58. What are you not willing to change for your marriage?
  59. What do you think are the benefits from being married?
  60. What is your favorite part of your lover’s body?
  61. Would you partake in a nude Jacuzzi with other couples in a resort where clothing is optional?
  62. How often would you like to have sex?
  63. What sexual fantasies do you still have that you’d like to turn into reality?
  64. How often would you like to have sex?
  65. What have you learned from your past relationships?
  66. Describe the best sexual experience you ever had.
  67. Who do you still need to forgive in your past?
  68. What is one life lesson you would like to share with your lover?
  69. What did you dislike most about your childhood?
  70. If your past lovers listed your most negative characteristics, what would they be?
  71. What was your most embarrassing moment?
  72. At what point in a marriage do you feel divorce is inevitable?
  73. What gift would you like your lover to give you on your wedding night?
  74. What are you sexually inhibited about?
  75. What makes you feel sexy?
  76. How do you like to be romanced?
  77. How long would you like lovemaking to last?
  78. What do you like to be called during lovemaking?
  79. How important is foreplay to you?
  80. Where is the place to touch you that turns you on the most?
  81. How would impotence affect your relationship?
  82. Have you had any sexual problems with any previous lovers?
  83. What changes do you expect to occur in your life after you are married?
  84. What if you and your lover can’t agree on having children?
  85. What is your greatest possession?
  86. Who or what do you love?
  87. If your lover wanted to see one of his exes socially, would you object?
  88. What fears do you have about marriage?
  89. What animal would best describe you in bed and why?
  90. Would you do a striptease for your lover?
  91. Would you have sex with your lover even if you weren’t in the mood?
  92. Would you let your lover tie you up?
  93. Do you like to use sex toys? If so, which ones?
  94. In order of priority, what sex act do you enjoy the most, oral sex giving, receiving or intercourse?
  95. Do you like to talk erotically in bed?
  96. What is your favorite sexual position and why?
  97. How do you feel about spanking?
  98. Do you enjoy sexual role-playing? If so, what role turns you on the most?
  99. What is the wildest sex act you’ve ever done?
  100. What would you do if your lover was unable to have sex with you due to an illness?