Geeky Games for Sexy Nights: Role-Playing Done Right!

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October 28, 2020

Geeky Games for Sexy Nights: Role-Playing Done Right!

With Halloween just around the corner, now is the time people start thinking about the sexiest ways to bring something fun to your bedroom. When it comes to your role-playing, whether you’re a Friday night lover, or a Saturday gamer, take some Do’s and Don’ts from the geek community and be prepared to role-play like you never have before!

Do brainstorm with your partner(s).

Find out what makes your partner tick! Do they have a particular character they would love to have in the bedroom? Does the idea of a sexy role-play scenario make them tremble? Brainstorm some props, roles, and costumes you want to try, and make yourself a shopping list! Be sure to also talk about the things that you don’t want to try, and make sure that you are letting your partner know if something is off limits. For some suggestions, check out this fantasy Halloween post!

Don’t let yourself get stuck into one role!

Many times, people who enjoy role-playing, can get stuck in a specific role. The beauty of fantasies, is that they become an excellent way to try new things, and to encourage a switching of roles. So feel free to try experimenting with your roles. Perhaps you are typically equal with your partner(s), maybe you can experiment with a little soft dominance and submission. Make sure you do your research with books like BDSM 101! If you like, you can even try playing with gender roles and exploring things that are out of the norm for you. Role-playing can be an excellent time to start toying with the idea of pegging, or acting out fantasies!

Do play around with costumes, props, and toys.

If you’re playing a naughty housekeeper, dress the part with a feather duster. If you have one that is clean, you can even use it to tickle your partner(s). Are you playing a sexy cowhand? get a little bit of rope to lasso your partner(s) in. You can even use that rope later to practice your bondage skills! Don’t be afraid to role-play with costume pieces you didn’t think of! Clark Kent’s tie can easily become a blindfold when he’s Superman. You can absolutely make use of old costumes, new costumes, and even your own closet for role play!

Don’t allow your body type or gender to decide what you role-play.

If you’re feeling sexy in what you’re wearing, or you are enjoying your fantasies and role-play with your partner(s) don’t allow your body to get in the way of that! If you want to be a male bodied Wonder Woman, do it! Feel free to rock that Lara Croft costume regardless of your body type. The best thing about role playing is that it doesn’t have to be for anyone else but you. You can enjoy the fantasies, the acting, and the scenarios without needing approval from anyone. So go ahead and pick up that pirate hat, and enjoy yourself!

Do act out your favorite fantasies!

Role-playing is an excellent way to try out new things without a lot of commitment. Are you feeling a bit more submissive, and want your partner to take the reins? Ask them! If you want to role-play that you’re a naughty school student, and your partner is a teacher, don’t be afraid to enjoy it. Between consenting adults, the taboo can include extraordinary pleasure. It is important though to respect your partner’s boundaries of comfort, and don’t push them into trying something that makes them feel uncomfortable!

Don’t feel pressured to do anything you don’t want to do.

Just because you have a specific fantasy doesn’t mean you want to act it out, and that is okay! It’s okay to have boundaries regarding what you’re willing to or not willing to do. It’s also okay to allow those boundaries to change. Sexuality is fluid and flexible, and allows for change and growth. If you were okay with something and then change your mind, that is absolutely allowed. Making sure you check in with your partner regularly to ensure that they are also enjoying themselves is important too. I recommend trying a Yes/No/Maybe list with your partner to outline things that you like, dislike, and want to try! Check out this Yes/No/Maybe list for some ideas!

Do get into the mindset.

If getting into a dominant character for your means painting your nails black and layering on the dark eyeliner, do it. If in order to really role-play a character you need to act like that character all day, give it a shot! There’s no script to follow in erotic role-playing, and no one to tell you that you’re doing it wrong. You get to decide how your role-play scenes go and what makes you feel good when playing them! Make sure you are in the right space for a role-play, and if you’re not feeling it that night, let your partner know that you’d rather try something else.

Don’t be afraid to go all out.

If you fantasize about giving a sexy massage with a happy ending? Pick up some of your favorite massage oil (may I recommend Southern Butter) and set up your room. Making the bed, setting out towels for your partner to lay on, and playing relaxing music. Really make sure to set the mood for your scene. If you’re Role-playing an office assistant and an employer, clean up your desk, and make sure you dress the part!

Whatever you’re doing, whether you’re role-playing a character, a part, a role, or simply dressing up in a costume, give it your all. Try to explore new things, but at the end of the day, make sure you don’t get so wrapped up in the role-play that you forget to have fun!

Erika Jordan’s Advice For Men Miss Red Flag

By

Erika Jordan

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October 23, 2020

Women come in different shapes and sizes, and learning who would be your perfect fit is a bit like reading a “choose your own adventure” novel. Unfortunately, that also means learning the “red flags” of who you aren’t looking for, and what kind of woman might be downright toxic for you.

A woman’s logical mind, heart, and libido tend to have different ideas regarding who might be the right person to pursue. So learning to find a compromise that makes every part of you happy can be borderline impossible in the long term.

If you want to date more efficiently and not waste precious time on someone who’s completely wrong for you. Then you need to recognize relationship red flags and learn how to stop a bad relationship before it starts.

Here are 11 types of “red flag women” you need to avoid while you’re dating.

1. The “rebound” red flag.

She needs to be in a relationship at all times and will set up a new nest before destroying the one she’s in. She’s constantly looking for someone better and will drop you the moment she secures her next “upgrade.” She fears nights alone and informs Facebook every time she leaves the house. This is a woman who seems to cycle through a lot of partners and boyfriends, and has no end of available people to pick from.

2. The “drunk girl at the party” red flag.

She feels most comfortable when she’s bar-hopping the night away. She parties with her posse until the sun comes up, even on a Tuesday. This girl will run up your bar tab getting plastered every night. Then, you can hold back her hair while she covers your leather seats with vomit. And if you still feel like doing the deed when you get home, let me remind you alcohol loosens everything up and desensitizes you. She might be the most exciting person in the party, but in real life, she won’t make a supportive partner.

3. The “dependent” red flag.

Her family, husbands, boyfriends, and divorce settlements have created a life for her in which she has never relied on herself for anything. She has no ambition and no interest in getting an education or career. She’s really good at doing nothing; she’s like a poor Kardashian. This woman has no dreams or ideas for creating a life for herself. She only wants to be taken care of and has zero ambition to do anything else.

4. The “designer everything” red flag.

This red-flag woman only wears the finest fabrics, and if it’s not designer, she doesn’t want it in the same room as her. She’s obsessed with fashion and has her cosmetic dentist and plastic surgeon on speed dial.She has a section in her closet just for yachting attire and if you don’t own a yacht, it’s a problem. A woman like this will expect to be wined-and-dined in an extravagant way and won’t settle for less. It may leave you scrambling to figure out how to support her lifestyle, or feeling like you’ll never be good enough.

5. The “addict” red flag.

This woman claims to have more ailments than a lab rat and knows which doctors are loose with the prescription pad. No one really seems to know what’s wrong with her, and her extreme moods can leave you reeling. A woman like this needs help and is in no way capable of being in a healthy, loving relationship at this time.

6. The “people pleaser” red flag.

This woman won’t disagree with you — ever. She agrees with everything you say. She’s a “sweetheart” and projects a selfless demeanor. Seems fine and dandy if you’re the type of man who doesn’t mind a girl without her own opinion. But in actuality, she has an opinion and keeps stuffing her own feelings and ideas deep down to appear more appealing to you. This is a passive woman that ends up becoming volatile and angry. Put simply, the sweetness is a mask to make her appealing, but it doesn’t stay.

7. The “childish” red flag.

This girl is forever a child. She’s anti-authority and likes to cause a scene, and isn’t afraid of having a tantrum like a toddler, loudly and in public. She pouts when she doesn’t get her way and doesn’t act mature, regardless of the situation. She’ll never dress or act appropriately, but still thinks she’s hip. You might like a good thrill, but with this girl, the thrill never stops… Until you end up in jail or a confrontation.

8. The “needy” red flag.

This isn’t just a girl who likes attention; this is a girl who needs it. Craves it, even. She needs attention at all times, so if you’re not available to reassure her 24/7, it’s likely she’s texting 10 other guys to get what she’s looking for. Someone like this isn’t going to be interested in a healthy, long-term relationship.

9. The “baby fever” red flag.

This woman tracks her ovulation with an app on her phone. She loves sex and refuses to use birth control. At least she tells you she’s on the pill, but you’ve personally never seen a single one. This girl is obsessed with having offspring and will do and say anything necessary to achieve this objective. This girl may want you to stick around, but it might only be to pay child support.

10. The “drama” red flag.

This is a “woe is me” type of human being who can never take responsibility for her part in her misery. Her life is more dramatic than a Quentin Tarantino film. Something happened in her life, and from that point, everything was one traumatic occurrence after another. She claims to hate drama, but seems to have a never-ending stream of it 24/7. Being around her will be exhausting.

11. The “procrastination” red flag.

This type of woman is not in the right place in her life for a relationship, but she’ll never actually admit it. Instead, she’ll keep breadcrumbing you along, pretending that a relationship is in the works. You hang on because she’s unpredictable and mysterious, and she’ll stick around for a bit while you pay the bill. Although people have a need for excitement and uncertainty, don’t get fooled by these relationship red-flag types. It’s time to grow and learn from past mistakes if you want to have a good relationship in the future, so break the pattern and get a better result!

Learn to ask questions that can help you spot red flags. Erika Jordan has some suggestions in Advice For Men Questions To Ask A Girl.

Come find me at PlaymatePickup.com My six week course, The Art Of PickUp is available with personalized guidance at PlaymatePickup.com. Acquire the skills to approach women with confidence and get them to want you!

Top 10 Easy Sexy Halloween Costumes

By

Janet Lovelace

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October 20, 2020

We’re more than halfway through October, and you little hot thing might have completely forgotten about Halloween! Dressing up might sound like something only trick-or-treaters might do, but attending a party in a very adult costume could prove for some equally very adult fun! (Wink!)

For anyone who’s scrambling for a last-minute look or just taking the easy sexy way, these ten hot Halloween looks from our friends at Yandy.com are a must-add-to-cart! Maybe this time, buy more than one so you’ve got a go-to for next year, too.

Fine Like Wine

Fancy being subordinate to a monarch? This sequin romper is gorgeously detailed with gold trimming, and adorned all over with deep purple sequins and mesh. To top it all off, Yandy’s Fine Like Wine comes with a sophisticated crown of the best grapes that money can buy. Shoes aren’t included, however, so make sure you pair it with a lovely metallic stiletto for a finishing touch. This costume might not be taking anything from pop culture, but it sure will be an iconic look even centuries after that Halloween party.

Cara Mia Mistress

Nothing says sexy more than leather. Channel your inner Morticia Addams and go on the prowl for the mon cheri to your cara mia on Halloween night. The costume turns you into a macabre Victorian lady of the house, featuring a high-slitted dress that accentuates your curves and elongates your figure. Yandy also updates it with a little bit of kink, adding some leather crisscrosses here and there to make it a little more delicious and dangerous. (The one right on the cleavage of the deep neckline is exceptionally so!) Complete the look with some styling details, from the hair, the makeup, the red nails, some quaint rings, and oh, throw in a red rose as a prop, too!

Little Red

Black not your thing? Go looking for the big bad wolf in this classic red costume. Fairytales can definitely be sexy, especially with a sweetheart neckline and a short ruffled skirt that makes you look good enough to eat. The embroidered detailing on the black bodice really steals the show, making it a step up from your typical off-the-rack Halloween costumes, but Yandy makes it a big deal to keep it well within sexy lingerie with the design and materials. The costume comes with the red satin cape, but the shoes and stockings aren’t included. Match it with cute thigh-highs and some school shoes, and a picnic basket full of condoms… You know, for fornicating frolicking through the forest.

French Maid

Here’s a four-piece lace-trimmed costume that’s sure to get anyone in the mood. The French maid has gone down as one of the most recognizable sex symbols, and you can live out your international sex kitten dreams for a night thanks to Yandy. It features the maid outfit adorned with lace trimming, with matching accessories like the choker, black leg garter, and the feather duster. The headpiece, however, isn’t included, but you can easily swap in a headband with some lace detailing to match.

Bad Habit Nun

The Bad Habit Nun is equal parts forbidden fruit, slutty, and badass. If you’ve been binging on the Warrior Nun, you might get inspired to go as a hot nun for Halloween. With cross details in black and gold all over, you’ll definitely get them to confess all their secrets to you. The high-neckline features a keyhole to show off two of your best assets, and the tulip skirt paired with the pure white stockings highlight your heaven-sent thighs. The fingerless gloves are also a great addition, making it a little more on the chic side thanks to Yandy.

Beetle Bombshell

For the film geeks, you know what to do: say her name three times, and the bombshell trickster will appear! This costume from Yandy is just as fun as it is sexy, with a chic blazer in black and white stripes accented with luminescent moss and beetle details. The black-tie and purple collar also help draw attention to the neckline! To make sure it doesn’t go full-fledged Halloween costume, try to tone down on the makeup. You can even style your hair a little differently, maybe with a modern twist since platinum white is always in fashion.

Wicked Vampire

Another classic costume that Yandy put a lingerie spin on is the Wicked Vampire costume. It mixes lace with luxurious velvet, showing all the skin that your vampire fellow can bite into. The deep neckline also features your neck and cleavage with criss-cross straps. The matching waist cincher isn’t all aesthetic, it’ll also help you curve out your body for that immortally stunning look. Oh, and don’t forget to complete the look with a vampy red lipstick and prosthetic fangs!

Sailor’s Delight

If you’re more into looking cute while being sexy, cop this adorable Sailor’s Delight from Yandy. It’s a no-frills, no-fuss outfit: a red, white, and blue mini-dress with some anchors and stars printed on. The red bow on the neckline is the cherry on top!

All Jazzed Up

Take it back to the Roaring 20’s with an extremely sexy flapper girl costume. Yandy’s All Jazzed Up costume comes with a navy blue stretch sequin romper with a fringe skirt to put some oomph into your dance moves. The plunging neckline is trimmed with faux gold diamond, ending in a criss-cross straps below the bust line. It also comes with a sequin feather fascinator to go on top of your finger wave bob! Other accessories aren’t included though, so you’ll have to be getting that pearl necklace in another way…

Boarding School Flirt

You don’t have to be a bad student to be a naughty one, but if you’ve gotten a school-girl crush on a hot young teacher before then this costume is perfect! The Boarding School Flirt is a three-piece outfit, including a dress that mimics a plaid-pleated skirt school uniform, plaid necktie, and matching plaid hair bows. Pair this classic costume from Yandy with thigh-high white socks and black high-heels to elevate it to sexy student. They also have quite a number of variations of this, so you can check out what fits your body best!

Whatever you end up choosing from Yandy’s awesome collection of easy and sexy Halloween costumes, make sure you’ve got the moves to back all that sexiness up in bed! Check out our sex advice and sex education articles to make sure you have as much fun dressing up as you do getting naked. 😉

What Is Your Love Language? The 5 Love Languages

By

Erika Jordan

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September 28, 2020

We all receive and show love in different ways. It is in our best interest to understand and be aware of our partner’s and our own love languages.

The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts

The love languages, from the book “The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts” by Gary Chapman, are Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch.

Each individual has at least one language that they prefer above the others and this is where it gets interesting. Your partner might show love by making you breakfast. But perhaps your love language is physical touch. You feel neglected because she didn’t stay in bed and cuddle. A simple shift in your awareness would have prevented this issue when in theory both of you just wanted to show and receive love. Let us break down the various love languages.

1. Words of Affirmation. These are any spoken or written words that confirm, support, uplift, and empathize with another person in a positive manner.

2. Acts of Service. This involves doing something for your partner that you know they would like. Such as filling up their gas, watering their plants, or cooking them a meal. When you give Acts of Service, you give up your time.

3. Receiving Gifts. That brings us to receiving gifts which is obviously a no brainer. The gifts likely work best when thoughtful. They don’t have to be expensive to be effective.

4. Quality Time. Is the love language that centers around togetherness. It is all about expressing your love and affection with your undivided attention. When you’re with your partner, you put down the cell phone, turn off the tablet, and focus on them.

5. Physical Touch. This is more about intimacy. It could be holding hands, laying your head on your partner’s shoulder, a massage or simply a hug.

We might not receive love the way we show it either so just because we use physical touch to show love doesn’t mean that’s how we best receive it. Maybe you have insecurity issues and feel most at ease when your partner often reminds you how much they love and appreciate you.. aka words of affirmation. Whatever the case may be it is in your best interest to understand your own love language and that of your partner! Miscommunication is the leading cause of discontentment and often times it could have been easily avoided with a few conversations and mindfulness.

If you’re relying on the universe bringing you some kind of effortless love in which your partner just happens to receive and give love the same way as you then you are denying yourself an opportunity for growth. Even if you find that perfect person you’ll get to a fork in the road sooner or later and communication and empathy will be required. Love isn’t an effortless adventure. It is an adventure both parties agree to go on that requires overcoming obstacles and hard work. That does not mean it is not also magical and effortless.. at times. If it was consistently effortless you would likely get bored anyway. All great things require work to attain and maintain.

This a good time to back up and think of a most important skill, active listening. Check out Erika Jordan’s Advice For Men – Skills.

Come find me at PlaymatePickup.com My six week course, The Art Of PickUp is available with personalized guidance at PlaymatePickup.com. Acquire the skills to approach women with confidence and get them to want you!

The Girlfriend Experience: Zoom Style

By

Erika Jordan

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September 16, 2020

What is it like when you have to negotiate a dating relationship while in lock-down during quarantine, zoom-style?

In the midst of a pandemic we could all use a laugh. Dating Coach of the stars, Erika Jordan brings the funny. Along with Tenere Williams, Erika presents The Girlfriend Experience, Zoom style. Be careful what you wish for as Erika Jordan brings all the girlfriend stereotypes to life.

For more on the funny side from Erika Jordan check out I Paid For This Date.

If you are ready to find love, have better sex or just be more charismatic try Erika Jordan’s six week course, The Art of Pickup! Acquire the skills to approach women with confidence and get them to want you!

Pandemic May Be Good For Your Dating Life

By

Erika Jordan

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September 12, 2020

Things suck right now. I normally like to look at things positively and I am a fan of the lack of traffic. But I’m right there with you in saying, I miss being able to do things. BUT dating isn’t on hold until there is a vaccine. Pandemic may be good for your dating life. Sure, there is currently an added challenge to what is already a challenging situation. But do we just go home if our freeway ramp is closed or do we reroute and head to next ramp?!

There’s a lot of guys whining right now about how they “weren’t doing well before the pandemic. And now they literally think I have the plague UGH I’m never going to get laid.”

First of all you should have taken my six week course, The Art Of Pickup, and acquired the skills to approach women with confidence and leave them wanting more. And you still can so get in the game.

Second, you’re antisocial and awkward, the pandemic is literally a godsend for your love life! Now you can take the time to think before you respond. All the women of the world have taken to the Internet to find love and you happen to have Wi-Fi!

You can control your image while showcasing the great. Remember to leave out the fact that you collect and burn your toenail clippings, which by the way is really weird and paranoid.

Things are finally working in your favor. If you’d like help setting up your profile and choosing images I’d be happy to do so. Check out The Best Online Dating Profile.

Otherwise, when you start talking to a girl online and you’re ready to meet. Remember we are in a pandemic but it’s just like adding another STD to the mix. Except you can catch COVID-19 even if she just blows you a kiss. Keeping that in mind have an open conversation and if either party has been taking risks there are testing centers everywhere. Some even have 30 minute results! Schedule a test before the date to put her mind at ease.

She’ll be swooning before the waiter brings the barcode that you need to scan to get the menu as you sit outside in the parking lot. I don’t know about you but I’m in Los Angeles and we’re only allowed to eat out if we’re sitting outside. It’s a good thing we have perfect weather!

The point is you don’t have to get a stray cat just so you have someone to cuddle. Before the pandemic lots of people were using dating websites and apps but now EVERYONE is online dating. This is your time to shine baby so find an outdoor hair salon, get rid of that caveman look and start a profile! If you would like help I’d be happy to do so!

Come find me at PlaymatePickup.com My six week course, The Art Of PickUp is available with personalized guidance at Virtual Sexpert.com. Acquire the skills to approach women with confidence and get them to want you!

Types Of Kissers Which One Are You?

By

Erika Jordan

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September 2, 2020

Kissing plays a very important role in attraction and having amazing sex. So, what kind of kisser are you?

Before we move on to our kissing tips for guys, let’s take a look at the type of kisser you do not want to be.

If any of these apply to you, I suggest an intervention for yourself.

The Serial Killer

Someone who will attempt to choke you with their tongue. Their goal is to get as much of their tongue into your mouth as possible. This might work out if a girl has an excellent gag reflex and doesn’t mind the slobber, but realistically you’re better off with the motto “less is more.”

The Vampire

An occasional nibble is a great thing, but this guy is out for blood. He bites lips, tongue, neck anything he can get in his mouth. The Vampire is a guy that has a girl dreading oral.

The Inhaler

This guy makes you feel like he can’t breathe, and you’re a bag of oxygen. You would pull away, but you can’t because the more you pull back, the harder he sucks. If you were a lollipop, this would be great, but you’re not.

Bug Eyed Kisser

A few seconds here and there taking a peek can be sexy. It shows a guy is present and focused on you but when he only closes his eyes to blink it makes you wonder what girl could look good that close and if you hit him over the head will his eyes remain in that cross eyed position?

Cotton Mouth

Too much tongue can be a bad thing, but this guy makes you wonder if he has one. An occasional flicker of the tongue keeps things lubricated.

The Ground Hog

Starts out with the Cotton Mouth when all of a sudden his tongue leaps out of his mouth into yours! Before you can reciprocate or react in any way, it’s gone leaving you to wonder if it happened at all.

The Loud Kisser

MUAH, slurp, ugh! It’s hard to get lost in the moment when each kiss comes with an almost cartoon-like sound effect.

Part-Time Kisser

These kisses are fine… It’s not the technique that makes this a negative it’s the lack of consistency. His ADHD goes into overdrive as he switches up the style and pressure every few seconds.

Mr. Perfect Kisser

Your knees buckle every time. He can take away your bad days and make your good days even better. Every once in a while you encounter a kiss that makes you believe in fairy tales. This type of kiss is guaranteed to lead to great sex!

KISSING TIPS FOR GUYS:

Now, you reeled her in, and it’s time for your first kiss!

These are some kissing tips to help you become a great kisser.

Step 1 – Preparation

Brush your teeth and tongue 2-3 times a day.

Don’t forget to floss and use mouth wash.

Try to avoid foods that cause bad breath like onions and garlic.

If all else fails, chew some parsley or mint leaves if you’re in a bind.

You can also counter bad smells with things like green tea, minty gum, carrots, mushrooms and lemons, or take some mustard and swish it around your mouth before swallowing.

Step 2 – Be Patient

Start out slow and with purpose.

Begin with a closed mouth kiss.

Next, slowly open your lips until you can feel their lip in between yours.

Step 3 – Escalate Properly

Don’t rush.

Trace her lips lightly with your tongue.

Throw in a lip nibble and gently suck her tongue when she puts it into yours. Feel her out.

Think of it as a dance and let her take the lead.

Soon you’ll be able to pick up on the rhythm, her kissing style and adjust accordingly to compliment it.

If you think your skills are up to snuff then it may be time to turn it up a notch. Check out Erika Jordan with The Ultimate Sex Game

Erika Jordan

Love Coach, NLP Practitioner

For more advice from Erika Jordan in a interactive format her six week course The Art Of Pickup is available at PlaymatePickup.com

Erotica Writers, Spread ‘Um: Finding Places to Publish

By

Ralph Greco

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August 30, 2020

As an erotica writer, you might know a thing about ‘spreading;’ legs, libido, desires, play with various partners. For this column, though, I am suggesting spreading your scribbling as far and wide as possible.

First of all, you should be spreading your net wide when exploring possible places to submit to. Market places like the EWR will lead you to erotic publication guidelines as well as upcoming anthology needs. But with the net as your guide, you can research lots of other places for up-to-the-minute changes to guidelines and instantaneous postings. I’d say check your favorite spots often and do some deep diving as much as you can.

Secondly, even if you write only within a specific genre, you might want to search outside of the usual publishers you know who support that genre. Sure, the more niche your writing is, the harder it might be to place it far and wide. Still, you’d be surprised at the places (publishing houses, online portals, small press anthologies) that consider those pieces that might fall a little farther afield than the usual fare they take, but somehow still fits their needs. You’ll need to do a little research, but I have found quite lusty naughty tales in sci-fi books because the sex happens a few years into the future or kink passages in places I’d never expect them.

It’s also a good idea to spread your titles around…if you can. Sure, the prevailing wisdom is for building a relationship with a publisher by getting a healthy listing of books with them, so they start to consider you a worthwhile commodity. But there is also something to be said for placing a bunch of titles across the field of a bunch of publishers. Admittedly, this isn’t so easy to do with a niche like erotica, where the pickings of potential publishers are few. But a long time ago, the wonderful and wise Jean Marie Stine of Renaissance E Books, Inc., the first house to publish my erotica and someplace I go back to time and again, told me that it was a good idea to have a bunch of books published by a bunch of different houses. She never saw this as competition as much as free advertising, in that if someone found and enjoyed a book of mine published by one house, they might go looking for more titles by me. That search might very well bring them to my books published by Jean Marie…or anybody else.

Makes sense, right?

Also, even if you stick with one genre (which I don’t), you might find one erotica publisher is open to naughty stories of a certain type while another is into something else. Or houses fill-up sometimes on one kind of thing and you might find another house open to what you have. This has happened often with me, and the only way I got ahead of the game was to spread myself around, do a little digging, see who might want at the time of my submitting, and keep open (ok spread) enough to take advantage of some options.

Lay down, spread-um, and take note. It will do you and your writing a world of good.

Photo by Leo Burca

7 Steps On How to Have a BrainGasm

By

Dr. Ava Cadell

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August 8, 2020

How to Have a BrainGasm

Sex starts between the ears as your brain influences the kind of sex you want to have, from romantic, playful, intimate, erotic or wild. Then it releases a powerful cocktail of brain chemicals as the sensations of pleasure travels between your legs.

In my book: NeuroLoveology, I explain what goes on in the brain during sex. Here is some of that info from my book.

Here are Dr. Ava Cadell’s Tips to How to Have a BrainGasm

1. Kissing to Rev up Your BrainGasm

With millions of nerve endings in the brain devoted to the lips, passionate kissing is essential to achieve a BrainGasm. During a long wet make-out kiss, adrenaline makes your heart race while the Nucleus Accumbens controls the release of Dopamine, (a craving signal) from the reward center of your brain.

2. Eye Gazing to Release Oxytocin

Once the juices are flowing, focus on your partner using eye gazing, with your full attention by looking deep into their eyes to release Oxytocin, the bonding chemical that establishes a greater sense of intimacy and increases desire.

3. Heart-Mind-Body Connection

Put your prominent hand on each others heart to light the emotional fire centers for a heart-mind-body connection. The Amygdala induces sexual energy from the brain as low Serotonin levels make you feel intense emotions as if two hearts beat as one.

4. Smell Arouses the Limbic System

Whisper how you are going to sexually satisfy your partner into their ears and take in their scent of arousal. Smell is the most primitive of all of our senses that comes from the olfactory bulb, part of the brain’s Limbic System, an area so closely connected with memory and emotion it’s often called the “Emotional Brain.”

5. Use Your Breath to Tingle Erogenous Zones

Take your partner’s breath away by using your breath around their most sensitive erogenous zones from the top of their neck to the tip of their toes. When you blow your cool breath on the left side of your partner’s body, you are stimulating the right side of their brain. Watch your partner’s muscles contract with pleasure, controlled by the Cerebellum.

6. Tickle Toes and Clitoris

Your partner should be begging you to touch them by now and with the first erotic touch on the nipples, toes or sexual organs, the brains Sensory Cortex region fires up. Neurons that are linked to your various erogenous zones communicate with the Sensory Cortex, to eventually activate the brain regions that produce orgasm. You may be interested to know that the toes are located next to the clitoris in the Sensory Cortex of the female brain.

7. Activate the Hippocampus & Cerebellum for Earth-Shattering BrainGasm

Nipple stimulation, oral sex, sexual intercourse and anal sex activate the Hippocampus, a region of the brain that evokes mind-blowing sensations, while the Frontal Cortex induces erotic fantasies and the Cerebellum triggers body-melting sexual tension, that can all result in an earth shattering, energy melting, all-embracing BrainGasm.

Best Sex Toys For Long Distance Relationships

By

Erika Jordan

-

July 9, 2020

I’m Erika Jordan certified love and health coach and NLP practitioner. Some of you might be in a long distance relationship. And some of you might be self isolating and your lover happens to be 3 miles away so it kind of feels like you are in a long-distance relationship. Whatever the case maybe I’ve got you covered with my top three most mind blowing sex toys for those of you in long-distance relationships or basically anyone because these toys are awesome.

Lovense is a long distance sex toy manufacturer. I call them that because all of their toys connect to an app, meaning that either you or your partner can control the sex toy from thousands of miles away. This means you can make your partner have an orgasm while she struggles through a zoom meeting or while walking the dog. Incorporate a bit of sexy talk maybe some imagery and you’ll be loving life with all the possibilities that come with app controlled sex toys!

Top 3 most mind blowing sex toys for those of you in long-distance relationships!

•1 The Hush is a vibrating butt plug. I really like this one because it has a stronger vibration than the majority of other butt plugs currently on the market.

•2 Lovense also has a masturbation sleeve which is controlled by your partner! The Max 2 has vibrations and constrictions so it’ll feel like your partners giving you a hand job from anywhere in the world!

•3 The Moxie is a wearable clitoral vibrator by We-Vibe. Much like the Lovense toys this little piece of heaven can be controlled from anywhere with the We-connect app. The Moxie is designed to be worn discreetly underneath your clothing and stays in place with a magnetic clip. Providing powerful but quiet vibrations so it can be worn out and about, to the grocery store, to Target, the post office, restaurants or anywhere else! Spice up your trip to the DMV while reigniting the spark in your relationship!

Long-distance couples need to be more aware of each other’s attempts to connect. We need love and affection no matter where we are. Just thinking “I’ll see them in 3 months” will only lead to your partner feeling neglected and possibly ending the relationship before you have a chance to show her how much you appreciate her. If you’ve scheduled a time to talk with your partner, make that call a priority, just as you would any work meeting or doctor’s appointment. If your partner has an important day, call or text to find out how it went. By weaving your partner’s needs into your day, you’ll demonstrate that you’re there for them, no matter how far apart you might be. Long distance relationships are tricky but they can work and even lead to a stronger relationship when you’re back to being in the same area code.. or home!

Stop settling for mediocre!

Since dating will need to be creative for awhile check out Erika Jordan’s advice in How Dating Will Be Forever Changed By Covid-19

Come find me at PlaymatePickup.com My six week course, The Art Of PickUp is available with personalized guidance at Virtual Sexpert.com. Acquire the skills to approach women with confidence and get them to want you!

Featured - The Best Sex Education Articles for Adults

Do brainstorm with your partner(s).

Don’t let yourself get stuck into one role!

Do play around with costumes, props, and toys.

Don’t allow your body type or gender to decide what you role-play.

Do act out your favorite fantasies!

Don’t feel pressured to do anything you don’t want to do.

Do get into the mindset.

Don’t be afraid to go all out.

Here are 11 types of “red flag women” you need to avoid while you’re dating.

1. The “rebound” red flag.

2. The “drunk girl at the party” red flag.

3. The “dependent” red flag.

4. The “designer everything” red flag.

5. The “addict” red flag.

6. The “people pleaser” red flag.

7. The “childish” red flag.

8. The “needy” red flag.

9. The “baby fever” red flag.

10. The “drama” red flag.

11. The “procrastination” red flag.

Fine Like Wine

Cara Mia Mistress

Little Red

French Maid

Bad Habit Nun

Beetle Bombshell

Wicked Vampire

Sailor’s Delight

All Jazzed Up

Boarding School Flirt

The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts

1. Kissing to Rev up Your BrainGasm

2. Eye Gazing to Release Oxytocin

3. Heart-Mind-Body Connection

4. Smell Arouses the Limbic System

5. Use Your Breath to Tingle Erogenous Zones

6. Tickle Toes and Clitoris

7. Activate the Hippocampus & Cerebellum for Earth-Shattering BrainGasm

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