Pegging: A Guide To Strap-on Sex for Beginners

May 8, 2021

Are you Reading to Learn Pegging & Strap-on Sex?

Table of Contents

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A 2011 sex survey found that 14.8% of men had used a strap-on in the bedroom, and a further 21.3% would like to try it.

That was nearly 10 years ago.

In modern times, heterosexual men are becoming more open to the idea of butt play – after all, the male G-spot (prostate) is up there for a reason.

You might have heard of “pegging” in women’s magazines, where it’s deemed the most outrageous and kinky thing to ever grace the earth.

I’m JC Way from The Sex Toy Collective, and I’m here to give you the lowdown on pegging and strap-on sex.

What is Pegging?

Put simply, pegging is when a woman uses a strap-on dildo to anally penetrate a man.

Of course, any gender can use a strap-on to have sex with any gender, but pegging almost exclusively covers cis women fucking cis men in the ass with a strap-on, so that’s what we’ll be mainly focusing on here.

Pegging usually happens as part of a male-female relationship when the couple decides to experiment and switch things up in the bedroom.

Why is Pegging Pleasurable?

So why would a woman want to fuck a guy with a strap-on anyway? Why would he like it if he’s straight?

Men

The anus is full of sensitive nerve endings
The prostate (male G-spot) is 2-3 inches inside your butt
Power exchange and role reversal
A more passive or submissive role

Women

Many strap-ons have bullet vibrator pouches for clitoral pleasure
Some strap-ons are designed for internal female pleasure
Power exchange and role reversal
Seeing their partner’s vulnerable reactions

For a lot of male-female couples, pegging is a way for men to feel less “in charge” in the bedroom and submit to the woman. It’s also a great way to introduce Power Exchange into the bedroom, one of the tenets of BDSM surrounding submission and domination.

Of course, I’m generalizing here. You might already be a dominant femdom with a submissive boyfriend, but most couples aren’t like that.

What’s Pegging Like For Women?

Here are some quotes from a Reddit post about why women like pegging their guys:

“The best part is knowing how good, awesome, hot, and amazing they’re feeling because you’re giving it to them. It’s really intense, intimate, and it makes me super wet and turned on.”

“What I love about it is how it affects my husband…it changes the power dynamic of sex, I love to hear him beg for my ‘dick’.”

“The faces they make when I hit the prostate. Dear lord. Typically guys don’t make these vulnerable, sexy expressions when they’re the ones pounding me so when I see it on them it’s so unexpected and hot.”

Which Strap-on Should I Buy?

If you wanna try pegging, there are 4 different types of strap-ons you can buy.

1. Harness & Dildo – the most common and versatile type, you often see “harness and dildo kits” on sites like LoveHoney and SheVibe. These harnesses are adjustable to all waist sizes and usually come with 1 or more “O-rings”. These O-rings sit near the crotch and hold the dildo in place.

Versatile – fit people of all sizes
Often come with different dildo sizes
Work with any suitable flared-base dildo
Easy to use

Vac-u-Lock – manufactured by sex toy company Doc Johnson, Vac-u-Lock strap-on kits are designed to be ultra-secure and stable, giving you the most rock-solid pegging penis. Vac-u-lock kits use a unique plug-like attachment to hold the dildo onto the harness firmly. Vac-u-lock dildos need to be used with a compatible vac-u-lock harness.

Ideal for pegging
Very strong and stable
Expensive
Harder to find

Strapless Strap-on – “strapless strap-ons” like the Tantus Feeldoe are designed to be worn by people with vaginas. They’re held in place by a “bulb” or “pony” attachment using the same muscles that hold a tampon in place. Some use vibrations in the bulb to give the wearer pleasure, but these strap-ons are best reserved for lesbian couples.

Ideal for lesbians
No straps or harnesses
Pleasure for both partners
Not as strong or stable

All-in-one Strap-on Kits – you can sometimes buy strap-on kits where the dildo is permanently attached to the harness and cannot be swapped out. These strap-ons are usually cheap, flimsy, and not ideal for pegging or anal sex.

Dildo permanently attached to harness
Cheap and low-quality
Flimsy
Not ideal for pegging

Which Strap-on Is Best For Anal Pegging?

Generally speaking, for a woman pegging a man in the bottom, I’d suggest a high-quality harness and dildo strap-on kit because you can easily experiment with different dildo sizes and work your way up over time.

Harnesses and dildo sets also have a high level of firmness and stability if used correctly – you need this for anal sex, as the butthole is much tighter than the vagina. The ass will put up more of a fight when you try to put stuff up there. Be prepared!

That segues us nicely into…

Lube, Douching, Fingering – How to Prepare for Pegging

Guys, if you’re reading this, I want you to know that anal sex feels great. As a man, it’s given me the best orgasms of my life. I have ejaculated from anal stimulation without touching my penis about 5 or 6 times. It’s insane.

But it ain’t no walk in the park, fellas.

You might want to consider anal douching before you go deep-diving down there.

Anal douching

The 2 types of douche I would recommend are bulb enemas (the classic squeezy design) and shower enema kits which use special shower attachment nozzles to clean out your butthole. Douching helps to flush poop out of your butthole, making it nice and clean with no nasty surprises.

However, if you eat a healthy diet and have very regular bowel movements, you might not need to douche, especially if you recently had a solid poop. In this case, a quick shower or wet wipe over the anus should suffice. The Sex Toy Collective’s anal douching guide goes into more detail.

Lube

Image from Broad City Pegging Episode: “Broad City” Knockoffs (TV Episode 2015)

Before pegging, apply a liberal amount of lube to the butthole and the dildo. I’d suggest lubing up the outside of the anus and also fingering it a little with a lubed-up finger.

Use a high-quality water-based lube, especially if using a silicone dildo.

DO NOT use silicone-based lube with a silicone dildo – it will destroy the toy.

Oil-based lubes and silicone-based lubes last the longest, but they can only be used with dildos made from stainless steel, glass, and wood.

Alas, you don’t find many wooden strap-ons.

Fingering

Giphy Image from Broad City Pegging Episode: “Broad City” Knockoffs (TV Episode 2015)

Brokeback Mountain made it look easy, but you can’t just bite the pillow and go in dry.

Ladies, warm him up by fingering his butthole with a lubed-up finger. Let him get used to the sensation of you being inside him. Slowly work up to 2 (or 3) fingers if and when he feels comfortable. You don’t need to move your fingers too much – let him get used to the stretch. This is new territory for a lot of guys.

Guys, relax. Your body will want to clench, but relax your ass and fight the urge to tense up. Relax. Accept the vulnerable position you’re in. Chill out. It will get better. When you feel ready, ask her to use 2 fingers or use the strap-on. It will get easier and more comfortable as your body adjusts.

Best Sex Positions for Pegging

So, what’s the best position for pegging? Which is the most comfortable?

Here are 3 pegging positions to try:

1. Doggy Style – an old classic, everyone knows how to do it doggy style. He gets on his hands and knees, she kneels behind him and slides the dildo into his bottom. Doggy style is the easiest position for pegging newcomers as it’s relatively comfortable and ladies can grab their partner’s hips for leverage. You might need pillows to get the right height.

2. Reverse Lap Dance – the woman sits down, with the dildo pointing up. Facing away from her, the man spreads his legs and “sits” onto the dildo, a bit like giving a lap dance while facing outwards. Gravity can help the male partner to get the strap-on inside his bottom more easily, and he also has to do most of the work with a position like this.

3. Anal Missionary – if the male partner is flexible, he can try lying on his back with his legs in the air. The woman then penetrates him with the dildo while his legs rest on her shoulders. This position is a great way to target the prostate (P-spot) and allow the partners to maintain eye contact.

These are 3 common pegging positions, but ultimately it’s down to you guys to decide what works best for you!